transitions

Evaluating Progress As Your Au Pair Aims to Improve

by cv harquail January 8, 2015
au pair performance, au pair rematch, host parent advice

How much improvement is ‘enough’ to shift an au pair out of  “on the way to rematch”? When there are performance issues with an Au Pair and we ask for an improvement, we expect that: (1) The au pair’s performance will improve, (2) Performance will improve enough to satisfy the Host Parent’s original concerns, (3) The […]

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Host Parent Wish: That Rematch would fix things, not send problems to another family

by cv harquail August 25, 2011
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If host families could change the au pair ‘system’, there are many things we would improve. Chief among these would be how au pairing is advertised, how au pairs are recruited and interviewed, how au pairs fulfill education requirements, and most of all, how au pair rematches are handled. Rematch and transition processes are the […]

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What can Host Parents Do about Deceptive Agency Practices?

by cv harquail April 14, 2011
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Readers, I must admit that these stories of being screwed by both agency & au pair get me upset. Thank goodness these stories are more rare than the terrific au pair and the perfectly fine au pairs we have little reason to need advice about. We all know that most au pairs, and most agency […]

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Explaining a Rematch to Host Children

by cv harquail October 22, 2010
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“It’s not you, it’s me.” if there is one time we want an au pair to appear somewhat self-focused, it’s when he or she is explaining to host kids that they are going into rematch. When an au pair says goodbye to host children, the AP should offer an explanation that puts responsibility solely on […]

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Have you ever regretted that you initiated a rematch?

by cv harquail June 29, 2010
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A host mom emailed to get my opinion on whether or not to go into rematch. This host mom and her family have a less-than-great au pair, one who is kind but can’t seem to complete tasks. Who is on time but ultimately not reliable. And, she’s not very smart. She’s so ‘not smart’ that […]

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Rematch with just 2 months to go? Or other options?

by cv harquail May 16, 2010
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An “I need advice right away” post from West Coast Mom: Dear Host Moms, Have any of you rematched near the end of your year? We are considering sending the current AP home, after an alarming call from another Mom who witnessed some alarming AP behavior in front of the kids (followed by months of […]

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Advice Wanted: Lost Mojo, Cold Feet. Now what?

by cv harquail June 7, 2009
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Some call it losing your Host Mom Mojo. Others call it cold feet. Whatever it is that MR has, she needs some advice: "My new au pair is scheduled to arrive in less then 3 weeks. So far, we have had 2 au pairs in one year, both were failed matches. To make the matters […]

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It’s not you, it’s her. Let her go, move on.

by cv harquail June 5, 2009
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Hi AuPair Mom and other other host moms (and dads), Our situation is confounding us! Please help us understand… We have had an absolutely bright, lovely, and energetic 20-year-old Swedish au pair for two months. We had a great first month with her and couldn’t imagine getting along better with anyone! We had a great […]

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5 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Considering Rematch

by cv harquail May 5, 2009
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How soon can you know that it just won’t work? Dory asked a question (which I post below) about whether she’s reasonable to think that she should rematch with another au pair. She’s only had this one for 3 months, but it isn’t promising. My quick response to her prompted this advice … 5 Questions […]

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