rules

The “Fire Or Blood” Rule for Au Pairs With Work-At-Home Parents

by cv harquail January 20, 2014
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I saw this photo on Twitter today and it cracked me up.        It reminded me of my own (vain? valiant?) attempts to teach my au pairs and now my tweenagers when it is and isn’t okay to interrupt me in my home office. (Remember this photo?) These days, I’ve shifted to a […]

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What is the right way to discipline your Au Pair?

by cv harquail January 4, 2013
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“Go sit in the corner.” Over the holidays, someone told me that they’d heard about an au pair who was told by her host mom to “go sit in the corner” as punishment for doing something wrong with the kids. I was appalled. What did that host mom think she was doing, disciplining an au […]

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Texting: Taming the Au Pair Distraction

by cv harquail February 10, 2012
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Who’s got an au pair who texts a lot?  Sometimes at inappropriate times, and often without any understanding of how this behavior distracts them? Raise your hands. Okay, you can all put down your hands. It annoys me hugely that people have bad manners when it comes to texting. In our family, we have rules […]

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When should we send our Family Handbook to our incoming au pair?

by cv harquail January 6, 2011
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As every reader of this blog knows, we are big fans of the concept of the Family Handbook. And by “we” I don’t mean the royal  moi, but all of us host parents (and even au pairs). It really helps to create a handbook to get your expectations and needs out into clear language, and […]

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Is Your Host Family Handbook Too Long?

by cv harquail June 21, 2010
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Eleven Au Pairs and 12 revisions after first being written, our Host Family Handbook is now, officially, “long”. Excluding examples of kids’ and au pairs’ schedules, and excluding the basic information about emergency phone numbers and the like, our rules/guidelines section runs 16 pages, with almost 4500 words. Is that too long? Host Family Handbook: […]

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What exactly is a Host Family Handbook?

by cv harquail June 21, 2010
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We’ve got a lit of different terms floating around to describe the written information that we give our au pairs. We call them handbooks, manuals, guidelines, and rules. (And who knows what our au pairs call them!) For the purposes of our conversations here on AuPairMom, let’s try to lock down the terminology. A Host […]

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Are “crazy” Au Pair guidelines really all that crazy?

by cv harquail June 9, 2010
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I laughed at the comment by Taking a Computer Lunch, on rules in her family handbook: My least favorite rule that I had to add – don’t burn candles and leave your room. Duh! As I look through our family handbook, there are some real doozies. My personal favorite is “In the evening, please do […]

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Why Safety Rules Matter

by cv harquail January 30, 2010
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I get a lot of crap from people about the safety rules at our house. Apparently we’re a little strict. Probably our most prominent safety rules have to do with driving. For example, I don’t use my cellphone when I drive. I just don’t. I’m that person who waits ’till she gets where she’s going, […]

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Extending with your current Au Pair: A Bad Idea?

by cv harquail April 20, 2009
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Our post about interviewing extension candidates reminds us of an earlier bit of advice that was a surprise to many of us host parents. My LCC gave me great advice. No matter how good the relationship is, NEVER extend with the same au pair. It almost never works out. She thinks that an au pair […]

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