au pair expectations

First Time Host Mom Wonders: Are her Au Pair expectations realistic?

by cv harquail November 7, 2016
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A new Host Mom writes to share her frustration – and concern- about an Au Pair who doesn’t quite seem to fit. Are the mom’s expectations too high, she wonders? Or, Does she just have an Au Pair who needs (even) more direction and motivation? I’d like to think that I asked all the right […]

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What Kinds of Relationships Do Au Pairs Want With Host Parents?

by cv harquail May 1, 2016
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There are many different types of equally good relationships that we host parents can have with our au pairs. Good host parent- au pair relationships can vary by — their level of intimacy (e.g., seriously close or pleasantly distant), — the amount of time we spend together (e.g., every waking moment or “I’m off duty, see you tomorrow, […]

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When What Host Parents Want Isn’t Quite What Host Parents Do

by cv harquail September 1, 2015
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Sometimes I look at my Au Pair handbook and roll my eyes. It is more fantasy than reality. More aspirational than actual. I look at the way I’ve described our family life: “We’re a fun loving family who enjoys playing together“, and I think of all the times I’d have preferred to stay on the […]

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Have Au Pairs Come to Expect Too Much? (Poll)

by cv harquail May 29, 2015
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A few weeks ago I raised the question:  How Have Au Pair Host Parents -As A Group- Changed Over Time?   BeachTown HostMom wrote to pose the other side of the question — (How) Have Au Pair expectations changed over time?   She writes: I’ve started to noticed some changes in the au pair community and […]

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Don’t Make Your Au Pair Do Your Kids’ Homework

by cv harquail March 8, 2014
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Haven’t we all wished for someone else to do our Algebra homework? That’s normal. What’s not so normal, though, is to ask your au pair to do your 17 year old’s homework. This situation is a little outside our usual boundaries, because the au pair is in Europe (US rules don’t apply), because she has […]

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Au Pair Asks: What happens when you discover that you can’t provide what your Host Kid with Special Needs needs?

by cv harquail October 15, 2010

Dear AuPairMoms- What happens when the au pair is placed with a host family that has a special needs child, and it isn’t working out? Both the agency and the host family knew beforehand that the au pair did not have any previous experience with special needs, but the Au Pair chose to take the […]

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What Size Bed for Your Au Pair (Poll)

by cv harquail March 11, 2010
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A host mom writes: Do we need to get a bigger bed for our next au pair? Our current au pair has a queen-size bed in her room, which used to be our guest room. We are moving to a larger home in a few months. The new house will have a guest room, and […]

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