After the Honeymoon: Seasons of the Au Pair Year

by cv harquail August 13, 2010
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A host mom who prefers to remain anonymous  shares her reflections, and helpful questions, about that delicate stage in your Au Pair- Host Family relationships…. those days when it only begins to dawn on you that, with this terrific au pair as well as any other, there will always be challenges… After the Honeymoon… The […]

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Share with your Au Pair your system for ‘disciplining’ your kids

by cv harquail August 10, 2010

Usually I shy away from offering or requesting parenting advice on this blog… I know what has worked for my family and I also know that every family’s systems have to fit within its own values, norms and culture. So, when it comes to questions of “how should my Au Pair discipline my kids” I […]

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How has your own international experience influenced your Host Parent Approach?

by cv harquail August 10, 2010
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Aupairgal asked a few weeks about how many host parents have lived abroad or were raised outside the USA. She’s wondering how our own international experiences have influenced how we approach being host parents. So let’s take some polls: How has living abroad affected how you interact with or understand your Au Pair?

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Is it demeaning to ask your au pair to iron kids’ clothes?

by cv harquail August 8, 2010
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When my girls were littler, they had lots of adorable cotton dresses. All of these dresses were wash’n wear, which meant that they were okay to wear if clean but wrinkly. To look fabulous, these dresses didn’t need lots of ironing– just 2 minutes with an iron on the collars, hems, and sashes turned them […]

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Your Au Pair’s Friends: Key to Her/His Happiness?

by cv harquail August 6, 2010
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It’s so important for your au pair to develop friendships here in the US. Your au pair needs friends to create a social life and to strike out beyond your home and family for some of her or his own adventures.  Once our au pairs have foud a friend or two (or three) they have […]

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A Different Perspective on Cultural Exchange

by cv harquail August 4, 2010
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For each of us the ‘cultural exchange’ part of the au pair program has a different meaning and importance. Are there many cases where the cultural exchange part feels irrelevant? Or, to put it bluntly, If the same sort of service existed to match American au pairs with other American families for the same overall […]

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What counts as “cultural exchange”?

by cv harquail August 3, 2010
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Host Mom KMW writes with this thoughtful question: Most families seem to include the cultural aspect of having an au pair as an important reason for going the au pair route. I have been thinking a lot about the pluses and minuses of Au Pairs vs. a US based nanny… and I’m wondering how much […]

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Sharing Your Hosting History with a new Au Pair

by cv harquail July 29, 2010
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With each au pair and au pair relationship, a host family develops experience and– if we’re lucky– also a bit of wisdom about the challenges of hosting an au pair successfully. Even when we have a so-so au pair, or a flameout au pair, we can learn something useful for the next time. And, when […]

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Choosing an Au Pair Agency: Two questions that might make a difference

by cv harquail July 28, 2010
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We haven’t talked in much detail about how to choose an agency — I’ve steered clear of that topic because I haven’t wanted anyone to think that I’m some kind of au pair agency secret agent, sent out to lure unsuspecting host families onto the rosters of agencies for an unspecified but generous kickback. Also, […]

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Birthday Gifts for Host Kids: Yes and No

by cv harquail July 26, 2010
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YES Any au pair with any sensitivity to the host child under her or his care should get that host child something to mark the child’s birthday. NO It doesn’t have to be expensive. It can be something as simple as a specially-selected yet store bought card with a photo insider. But, no, you Au […]

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