Angry 11 yr old, Avoidant Parents- what’s an au pair to do?

by cv harquail March 27, 2011
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Dear AuPairMom — Hi, I was using google to look for some advice when I came across your website. I’m an au pair and I’ve been living in the US for 3 months now and at the minute, my 9 months remaining just feels like the longest time. I look after 2 kids and I’m […]

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Infidelity more of a concern than you’d think

by cv harquail March 25, 2011

Hi readers- A quick note here before I dash off to work today– I took down the previous post about the au pair who saw a host parent’s infidelity. Why? Because not one, or two, but three different and unrelated people emailed me to say that the post ‘hit too close to home’ for them. […]

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How risky is it to travel when her J-1 Visa is soon to expire?

by cv harquail March 17, 2011
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Smart Risks vs. Risky Risks Everything is risky, including traveling with your au pair outside of the US while she is on a J-1 visa. We know from previous conversations that even though a visa may still be valid, a customs person could deny your au pair re-entry into the USA. But how real is […]

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Plan Ahead for Disasters: Tips from CalifMom

by cv harquail March 14, 2011

We know what we ‘should’ do, but we often just don’t get to it. Who wants to think about how she or he can respond to horrific tragedies, like terrorism, earthquakes, and floods? That’s the kind of thing for action movie heros, not ah pair host parents, right? We’ve brought this issue up before and […]

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Have a 9-11 Plan for your family and your au pair

by cv harquail March 14, 2011
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(First published on 9.11.09.  Republished with original comments.) Thinking about ‘lessons’ from 9-11 can often be heartbreaking, especially in my community where so many of us lost family, friends and co-workers in the WTC attacks. It’s almost disrespectful to bring up the idea of a “9-11” plan, but maybe thinking ahead about how we might […]

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Our Au Pair is from Tokoyo and her world has fallen apart. How can we help?

by cv harquail March 13, 2011
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Dear Au Pair Mom- I’m sure that we are not alone with this concern, and we’d love some ideas how to help: Our au pair is from a town about 25 miles southeast of Tokyo (further aware form the center of the earthquake). She is terribly worried about her family and friends after the earthquake, […]

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How Should An Au Pair Bring Up A Challenging Topic? Your preferences

by cv harquail March 9, 2011
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We all want our au pairs to let us know if they have questions, concerns, or issues that are bothering them. But how do we want them to bring these issues up? In our family, the informal-yet-scheduled-family-meeting is the best place to bring up any “issue” that goes beyond something like how best to load […]

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All the little things … that add up to a BIG help

by cv harquail March 5, 2011
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Annonamomma has suggested that we take some time to talk about “all the little things” that keep a house, a home, and a host parent happy. She writes: Could we do a post on the little things?? you know the little things that keep a house happy, i.e. send the no milk text, empty the […]

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Arguments between my child and my Au Pair are driving me nuts!

by cv harquail March 5, 2011
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Dear Au Pair Mom readers– Our au pair has been with us for 1 1/2 months. She’s 19, Italian, and speaks excellent English. She cares for our daughter while I work part-time the house, part-time out. The problem is that our daughter, who is about to turn 4, is having a hard time with this […]

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Where to Begin: New Host Mom, New Au Pair

by cv harquail February 28, 2011
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Maybe I’m more obsessive than the average bear, but I recall thinking I was as ready as I could be when our very first au pair arrived. And, that was back in the days when Handbooks were merely a suggestion, and life was much more simple. I also remember feeling pretty alone. Although there were […]

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