Help: We Need Our Au Pair to Grow Up

by cv harquail October 28, 2011
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Au Pairs mature a lot during their year(s) in our homes. Most of them become more independent, more worldly, more self-confident, and more self-directed. They pretty much have to grow, since the challenges of living in another country, with another family, with responsibility for childcare are just to much for an immature person to handle […]

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Invasion of Privacy: Time for rematch?

by cv harquail October 19, 2011
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Here at AuPairMom we get some very interesting emails from host parents and au pairs facing challenges in their relationships. Sometimes these questions are easy to answer, other times the whole group of us has to band together to come up with useful advice. Sometimes these emails make me sad — so much struggle, such […]

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Drastic Changes: When a Host Parent Gets Sick

by cv harquail October 16, 2011
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Two difficult challenges have hit my friends this past month. Last week a friend’s BIL slipped off a ladder, and is now in an intensive care unit coping with serious head trauma. His recovery will be long, difficult and uncertain. Earlier in the month, a friend’s sister was diagnosed with cancer, for the third time. […]

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3 Qualities of a Fabulous Host Family

by cv harquail October 16, 2011
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What makes a host family fabulous? And, how is a fabulous host family different from a pretty-good host family? From what I’ve seen, all fabulous host families demonstrate three core characteristics: Clarity Flexibility Positivity 1. Fabulous Host Families Demonstrate Clarity — A fabulous host family knows what they need for a great family- au pair […]

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How To Find a Short-Term Au Pair

by cv harquail October 15, 2011
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Sometimes, you just don’t need an au pair for a whole year. You may need just 8 months, until your child has a full school day, or until you drop down to part-time work. You may just need an au pair to cover a gap between a departing au pair and some other childcare arrangement.  […]

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Too Much Generosity or the Wrong Kind? Trust your heart

by cv harquail October 8, 2011
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Dear AuPairMom- The posting from the host mom offering the fancy host family situation make me think of the choices that I made when I was matching with my host family. I talked to many different families. All of them had some different things to offer, cars yes or no, no Saturday nights, babies and […]

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Too Good to be True?

by cv harquail October 7, 2011
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A while ago I got a request for advice — a host mom was mystified that her desired au pair candidates seemed uninterested in the opportunity she had to offer. After all, what au pair wouldn’t want a situation that required only 20 hours per week, paid vacations with the family, her own apartment underneath […]

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Interpreting the Lanugage of Lag Time: Emailing Prospective Au Pairs

by cv harquail September 27, 2011
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It’s kind of ironic for me to post a query about the topic of how to interpret the lag time between sending an email and an au pair candidate responding. As several of you with whom I correspond with on email already know– I can be “not very prompt” in my replies. What does this […]

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Who counts as an “American” family?

by cv harquail September 19, 2011
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I imagine that every au pair has an idea of what her or his “ideal” host family should be like. The assortment of children, the family’s location, their personality, their basic household rules… all of this factors in. But how much do you think it matters that the family be “American”-American, rather than German-American or […]

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Longest question, shortest answer: Rematch now

by cv harquail September 12, 2011
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It’s hard to imagine that the long, thoughtful email, below — all 1600 words of it — need only two words in reply: Rematch now. I could probably add three more words: Don’t Feel Guilty. But I will leave it up to you, dear readers, to share other words of support with this mom. …. […]

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