Au Pair Candidate with Uncommon Medical Issue: Would you match with her?

by cv harquail January 30, 2014
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We get a lot of questions from au pair candidates who wonder whether anyone will match with them, given that they ______(fill in the blank here). For example, we just got an email (below) from an au pair with (non-swearing) Tourette’s Syndrome, who wonders whether host parents will consider her application. When you have an […]

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Policies for Hosting Out-Of-Town Guests: Polls

by cv harquail January 25, 2014
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 Let’s get a sense of how many of us have which kinds of guidelines about out-of-town guests.     Take these polls, below  —- but EXCLUDE romantic relationships (e.g., boyfriend or girlfriend from back home) since these have been shown to have a separate dynamic. More on that in another post.   Please add details […]

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When Your Au Pair’s Parents Come to Visit

by cv harquail January 23, 2014
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Dear AuPair Mom–  We have a lovely, responsible Au Pair whose parents miss her dearly. They have decided to visit twice (twice!) during the year and want to stay with us in order to maximize their time with their daughter.  I’m apprehensive about the whole thing, because hosting parents is not the same as hosting […]

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When Your Au Pair is the Neighborhood Safety Net

by cv harquail January 22, 2014
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We’re on our fourth day of snow-related school closings this month, and I’m really starting to feel the burden of being the only adult working at home– in (what seems like) the whole neighborhood. For parents who work outside the home, snow days can cause a lot of childcare problems. If you have a childcare […]

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The “Fire Or Blood” Rule for Au Pairs With Work-At-Home Parents

by cv harquail January 20, 2014
do not disturb

I saw this photo on Twitter today and it cracked me up.        It reminded me of my own (vain? valiant?) attempts to teach my au pairs and now my tweenagers when it is and isn’t okay to interrupt me in my home office. (Remember this photo?) These days, I’ve shifted to a […]

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Announcing Au Pair Appreciation Week 2014

by cv harquail January 11, 2014

The 6th Annual International Au Pair Appreciation Week February 1 – 7, 2014 Host Parents, start your appreciation engines.…! For details on how celebrate your au pair or another au pair you know, click ahead…..

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What Kind of Parent Are You — To Your Au Pair?

by cv harquail January 8, 2014
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No Host Parent wants to feel responsible for an au pair who’s unable to take care of him/herself. We complain to each other bitterly “If I’d wanted another ‘dependent’, I’d have had another kid!” And, we resent the idea that there is another anything (much less an actual person whom we care about) that we […]

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Do You Have Regular Weekly Meetings With Your Au Pair?

by cv harquail January 5, 2014
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Some Host Parents swear by the Weekly Meeting as The. One. Thing. (along with the Handbook, of course) that keeps the relationship running smoothly. Weekly meetings have a lot to recommend them. Meetings that are: Regular Planned in advance Agenda driven Happen outside of the day to day rush or parent/au pair transition time — […]

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What’s Your Host Parent “Word” for 2014?

by cv harquail January 1, 2014
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Of all the different suggestions for setting New Year resolutions ‘n things, my favorite is the one where you choose a word (or two, or even three) to guide you during the new year.   I like this one because it’s so minimal, and so do-able, that it’s hard not to be successful in one […]

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Do Au Pair Agencies Really Rematch Au Pairs Who’ve Violated Safety Rules?

by cv harquail December 30, 2013
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When it comes to host parents asking for a rematch, there are many grey areas. Whose fault was the problem? Did the parties try hard enough to fix things? Is the issue worth rematching over? We can debate these questions in almost every case. Except one– when an au pair violates a safety rule. If […]

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