Should We Extend? Au Pair is Great, but also Boring

by cv harquail January 20, 2016
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I laughed out loud at the subject line of the email that sent this issue to Au Pair Mom. It’s almost — but not quite– a luxury to imagine being bothered by a “boring” Au Pair, if this Au Pair comes on the heels of a “Flameout”, a “Party Girl”, or a “Couch Potato”.  Not […]

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Why Doesn’t the Au Pair Agency Want Us to Help Out Another Au Pair?

by cv harquail January 18, 2016
hole in the heart by elton harding

When Host Families hear about Au Pairs in trouble, we often try to help.   Host Families sometimes get some early, insider information about Au Pair – Host Family relationships that are deteriorating. When the Au Pair in question looks like s/he’s getting a raw deal, it can be tempting to offer to step in and help. […]

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How Best To Celebrate Our Au Pair’s Extension? (Poll)

by cv harquail January 14, 2016
download

Dear AuPairMom — We’d love the community’s advice about how to recognize and celebrate our Au Pair’s agreement to extend with us.   I’d like to know what is expected, common, meaningful, etc. Our family with save about $1500 (not to mention loads of time and hassle) because she’s extending for another year. I’d like […]

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Help Your Au Pair Develop Rituals For Bonding With Host Kids

by cv harquail January 12, 2016
au pair, host child, childcare

As I was snuggling my tweenager on the couch after a hard day at school, my mind wandered back to all those times when I’d come home from the University to find this same daughter — infant sized — snuggled up in the rocking chair napping with our Au Pair Margit. All the books I’d […]

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When Parenting Styles Conflict

by cv harquail January 6, 2016
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Au Pairs and Host Children need consistent expectations from Parents in order to do well.   In families where both Host Parents have a similar parenting philosophy, or where one parent takes the “lead” and makes all the parenting decisions, ‘doing a great job’ is easier for Au Pairs. AuPairs need to adapt to only one parenting style, […]

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Making New Year’s Resolutions WITH Your Au Pair

by cv harquail January 4, 2016
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Number 5 on the short list of stupid, true things about life that I try not to let annoy me is this: It’s hard to change things* when people around you resist having you change. *”things” being: yourself, your situation, how you do things, what gets done, what is prioritized, etc. We forget that our lives are so […]

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How To Evaluate An Infant-Qualified Au Pair Candidate

by cv harquail December 27, 2015
au pair, infant-qualified

For many of us Host Moms and Dads, our first Au Pair arrives shortly after our first baby. Twice in one season you become a new parent– first of your own baby, and then of your Au Pair. I look back on those times now and think how absolutely naive I was about both new […]

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Letting Things Go Over The Holidays

by cv harquail December 26, 2015
Some of the glitter garland I made for our tree.

My inbox barrages me with contradictory messages. I’ve gotten a slew of emails trying to inspire me to up my game for the New Year.  They want to help me with making resolutions, finding my words of the year, buying a new planner, setting an editorial calendar, changing my relationship with food, finding my inner courage, and […]

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Au Pair’s Host Child Using iPad Improperly– How should she discuss with Host Parents?

by cv harquail December 16, 2015
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Apologies, readers, for the euphemism in the headline — by “improperly”, we’re meaning “hey the Host Kid is looking at websites with the letters  s – e -x in the title”….. Host Parents and Au Pairs are aligned in a main childcare goal– keeping the children safe. “Safe”, of course, has a lot of different meanings…usually […]

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Don’t Be Afraid To Rematch If Your Au Pair Can’t Drive

by cv harquail December 11, 2015
au pair can

I truly appreciate Host Parents who are reluctant to rematch when their Au Pair isn’t “perfect”.   I appreciate Host Parents who are willing to “work it out”, who are willing to reset their expectations, and who are willing to celebrate what an Au Pair *has* rather than worry about what an Au Pair is […]

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