New Au Pair Has Whooping Cough and Will Be Infectious for Up to 12 Weeks!

by cv harquail May 9, 2016
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Seriously Host Parents — can’t you send me emails about dilemmas that can be announced with catchy headlines??? Very rarely am I able to say — “I never heard of a problem like this before.”  While I like novelty as much as the next American, I’m not happy to see this problem now. This is a […]

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What Kinds of Relationships Do Au Pairs Want With Host Parents?

by cv harquail May 1, 2016
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There are many different types of equally good relationships that we host parents can have with our au pairs. Good host parent- au pair relationships can vary by — their level of intimacy (e.g., seriously close or pleasantly distant), — the amount of time we spend together (e.g., every waking moment or “I’m off duty, see you tomorrow, […]

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How Soon To Schedule Au Pair’s First Day Off?

by cv harquail April 24, 2016
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Venturing into the grey areas of Au Pair regulations and scheduling, a First Time Host Mom asks– how many days might a brand new au pair work before she must be given a day off?   (I phrased it differently in the headline of this post, but essentially it’s the same question).  She’s thinking about […]

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Is Two Weeks Enough To Time To Know We Need A Rematch? When I say “Yes”

by cv harquail April 23, 2016
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When a new Au Pair arrives and is clearly not working out, sensible Host Parents start thinking about rematch.  If the Au Pair does something unsafe, dishonest, or mean — ask for rematch right away. With other situations, it makes more sense to give it a little time. You might think your au pair is […]

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Any Way to Change Behavior of an Au Pair Who’s Always Late?

by cv harquail April 15, 2016
Running Late Au Pair

What do you do when you’ve organized yourself and been clear about your needs, but find yourself unable to influence the behavior of your Au Pair? When communication or training differences pop up, we usually go back to the basics: Do you have a handbook? Do you have regular check-in meetings? Were you clear about […]

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Au Pair’s Increasingly Limited Diet is Increasingly Stressing Us

by cv harquail April 12, 2016
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Everyone say it together: Rematch. Now. New Host Mom, this au pair is putting  you through the wringer over food issues. You should try one more time to set some limits about what food you will and will not provide.  You were clear when you were matching, and it’s your au pair who’s changed the […]

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Well That Was Interesting …

by cv harquail April 12, 2016

I leave the country for FOUR WHOLE DAYS and the blog gets hacked ! Grrrrrrr. Thank you, friends, for emailing to let me know.  Password changed. I thought I’d have time to put up a post or two but I am stuffing my face with pain au chocolat and explaining to every American tourist I […]

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How Long is Too Long to Hold an Au Pair Candidate’s File?

by cv harquail April 7, 2016
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I don’t know anything about baseball, but even so, the question raised in this post is a little “inside baseball”.  I think that means, you have to know a good bit already to even have an opinion about it. Briefly, the situation: — A mom writes that she’s having a hard time finding candidates, and she […]

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Write Your Departing Au Pair A Decent Letter of Reference

by cv harquail April 5, 2016
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…as long as she wasn’t unsafe, devious, or truly dreadful. A Host Parent Letter of Reference Makes a Difference Whether it’s for an au pair extending with another family, rematching due to poor fit with you, or applying for a job, school program or other opportunity, a letter of reference helps your au pair document […]

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Share Your Schedules for Training Your AuPair — The First Week

by cv harquail April 3, 2016
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Looking over the many posts about getting started with an au pair, I made an interesting discovery: We have no posts with actual, recommended schedules. We have one really solid post from 2008 (!) where I list 5 strategies for orienting your au  pair in the first week: 1. Start with the typical day’s tasks. […]

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