Our Local Counselor is Unhelpful: What’s a good recourse?

by cv harquail February 12, 2019
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Dear AuPairMom — I’ve been googling endlessly to try to find some answers to my scenario but I’m at a loss-hoping you can help. Our au pair joined our family in November. We have. 2.5 year old and welcomed twins in december. She has been watching our 2.5 year old and will start watching the […]

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New Host Mom w/ Twins asks: Are my expectations unreasonable?

by cv harquail February 6, 2019

I’m emailing you to ask for advice. I thought I was ready for an au pair, and understood the process, but this has been an awful situation and I need guidance as to whether my expectations are too high or if we just had a poor match. We live in a small city in the […]

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Update on the Au Pair Lawsuit — what’s next?

by cv harquail January 10, 2019
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I could hardly sleep last night after reading the Wall Street Journal’s article about the recently proposed settlement of the lawsuit against Au Pair Agencies. The agencies will be paying out around 65 million dollars to au pairs who sign up online at a site created by the law firm pursuing the suit. As many […]

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When domestic travel is a part of the normal family rhythm how do you set yourself up for success?

by Texas HM November 20, 2018
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While working on an updated bropair post (still to come – email me if you host bropairs and don’t mind answering a few questions!) I got this email from a proactive host dad with an interesting scenario.  It is clear he has spent a lot of time thinking about how to set his family and […]

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Does a candidate’s childcare or work experience really matter?

by Texas HM October 24, 2018
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I fully realize this flies in the face of parental logic/intuition and I regularly get a shocked expression when I tell other host parents that I don’t factor childcare experience AT ALL into my au pair interviewing/selection process. Keeping in mind our au pairs’ favorite joke is that it’s easier to get into the CIA […]

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Are oldest children better au pairs? Does an au pair’s family dynamics determine success?

by Texas HM October 16, 2018
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On the last post a couple of folks commented that they would “never pick an only child” AP again. After a painful transition I myself recall saying that I was “never going to pick a youngest child again” – for many of the same reasons those people attributed to only children so it got me thinking – does […]

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Your Bra is Showing and My Kids Shirt is on Backwards – Giving APs Candid Feedback

by Texas HM September 11, 2018

I was chatting with fellow long time host mom/LCC/AP Mom regular Julie Dye this week and when she quoted her college professor R Wayne Boss at the University of Colorado – Boulder and it prompted me to shout “Amen” on the spot and ask if I could share/write a post about it! He says this: “Never […]

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Help This Mom Choose an Au Pair for Her Child with Autism

by cv harquail August 31, 2018

We can’t *really* tell which candidate is better, but we might be able to give this host mom some ideas for thinking about her choices. …   First let me offer a big thank you – your blog is a wealth of information and I’ve learned so much from reading through it (and I’m grateful […]

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Life Lessons in Cultural Exchange – Soft Benefits by TexasHM

by Texas HM August 25, 2018
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There are often discussions of the additional soft costs of hosting – some of which are “harder” and can be quantified like car insurance, little higher water/food bills or an additional Disney ticket but some of which can’t like the emotional investment/bonds made or time spent investing in your APs experience by providing a shoulder to […]

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Finishing Strong – Having a Proactive Conversation about the End – by TexasHM

by Texas HM August 20, 2018
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  Photo by Alora Griffiths on Unsplash Over the years in part thanks to some great advice on this site I have had many “we really need you to hold it together” proactive chats with our au pairs.  Some didn’t really need the chat and finished the last day with the same zeal and commitment that they did […]

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