Good Bye, Good Luck from exAuPairMom

by cv harquail October 13, 2009
Flower FairyFolk etsy.jpeg

I always wonder about “the rest of the story” when I get a notice that someone has unsubscribed from the email newsletter .. for the reason that “the content is no longer valid”. I usually take that to mean “we don’t have an au pair anymore”. Over the weekend we got this letter from a […]

35 comments Read the full article →

How to Handle Under-Age Drinking

by cv harquail October 7, 2009
_79_237421846_b2a9f55d40.jpg

How do you handle it when you discover that your au pair has been out drinking, even though she is under the legal drinking age in your state? What if she has been out drinking with older au pairs? Or gone to a keg party at a local college? Or just bought some wine to […]

52 comments Read the full article →

Matching with an Au Pair: When Racism interferes

by cv harquail October 2, 2009
man, woman and child threecee.jpeg

Take a deep breath everyone– time to talk about something many people find uncomfortable: Racism.  But talk about it we must, because racism gets in the way of our relationships with each other. 3 Sources of “Racism Interference” Racism interference can come from three directions, any of which can influence your match with an Au […]

56 comments Read the full article →

Don’t break your own childcare rules

by cv harquail September 30, 2009
_3280_2398803773_6cd829eeac.jpg

Here’s a way to mess up your relationship with your au pair, your au pair’s relationship with your child(ren), and your child(ren)’s relationship with you, all at once: Break your own childcare rules. Have a rule that no candy can be eaten before dinner? How about not letting the kids watch tv before homework, or […]

23 comments Read the full article →

Share the Cream: Give your AP meaningful work to do

by cv harquail September 28, 2009
200909282010.jpg

One piece of advice my friend Adelaide gave me when we got our first au pair was “Share the Cream.” “Sharing the Cream” means sharing both the good parts (the cream) as well as the tough parts of a job or an experience. I don’t know where Adelaide came up with this saying, but it’s […]

12 comments Read the full article →

Choosing an Au Pair: How to Avoid a Princess

by cv harquail September 26, 2009
_images_Once-Upon-A-Mattress(PL11)-8-10.jpg

If only it were as easy as sticking a green vegetable underneath her mattress and waiting to see if she gets a good night’s sleep… We all want to avoid “the princess” – the au pair candidate who thinks the job is all about visiting the States, living in an American home, and having an […]

50 comments Read the full article →

When your personal, private challenges affect your Au Pair relationship

by cv harquail September 23, 2009
swallows by Fergal OP.jpg

Often on this blog we talk about what’s happening between you and your au pair as the source of difficulties– but sometimes the difficulty is all of our own making. Things happen to us host parents — grandparents die, host parents divorce, someone loses a job, a parent gets hospitalized, a child is challenged, and […]

22 comments Read the full article →

Male Au Pairs: When would you hire one? (Poll)

by cv harquail September 22, 2009
200909221712.jpg

Have you ever thought about hiring a male au pair? I haven’t considered it, since I have two girls and I’m looking for positive young women as role models…. but one of my girlfriends has a male au pair for their two sons, and she’s found that a male au pair has been just as […]

51 comments Read the full article →

R.T.F.M. Making sure your Au Pair Reads the Family Manual

by cv harquail September 17, 2009
200909161524.jpg

Long before there was OMG, ROTFLMAO and WTF, there was RTFM. R ead T he F (your favorite F word here. We use “family”) M anual We put a lot of work into those family manuals and handbooks, and we expect them to be useful to our Au Pairs. However, before the Au Pairs find […]

75 comments Read the full article →

3 Questions to Ask Yourself as Rematch Approaches

by cv harquail September 16, 2009
200909161006.jpg

We received an email from a host mom who unintentionally became a doormat, and who wonders whether she should consider rematching. Since I feel confident at how you all will respond once your read her email (a link to which appears below), I thought instead we might consider how, when facing a rematch, we can […]

20 comments Read the full article →

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →