Your Host Parent approach

Share The Fun and the Not-So-Fun with Your Au Pair

by cv harquail November 11, 2014
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Prompted by our conversation over the weekend about the au pair who was unhappy with the ratio of chores-to-child interaction in his work week, I’m reposting something from 2009: One super-helpful piece of advice my friend Adelaide gave me when we got our first au pair was “Be Sure to Share the Cream.” Share both […]

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One Slight After Another: Can this au pair relationship be saved?

by cv harquail September 29, 2014
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It’s interesting to get emails from host parents — and au pairs– where it seems that the very act of writing to us is helping them gain some clarity about how untenable their situation actually is. This seems especially true when there isn’t one prominent issue but instead several smaller ones that, when all pulled […]

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Should She Ask Her Host Mom To Read AuPairMom?

by cv harquail September 8, 2014
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Dear AuPairMom – I have been reading AuPairMom while I was deciding to become an au pair and I was expecting that what you have on this blog explains what an au pair should expect. My host mom seems to be having some struggles with having an au pair. I’m my family’s first au pair. My family is […]

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Host Mom Desperately Trying — Too Hard?

by cv harquail September 3, 2014
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What is it they say about choosing a third au pair after two huge disappointments: It’s the “Triumph of Hope over Experience”? OzHostMom writes with a quandary: She’s really trying, she’s really optimistic, except she’s lost her host mom mojo. I’ve reordered her story, below, so that you get the critical point near the start: […]

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3 Features of Au Pairing: Which One Challenges You?

by cv harquail September 1, 2014
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What are the real, important differences between Au Pairs and other kinds of childcare providers, like nannies, babysitters, or childcare centers? What really influences the challenges that host parents and au pairs face when it comes to making this ‘the best year ever’? It used to be that when people asked me how having an […]

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Do you ‘overshare’ or ‘undershare’ with your Au Pair?

by cv harquail August 21, 2014
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I didn’t realized what a private creature I could be until we had our first au pair. With roommates it felt like nothing was off limits, and with my DH the main thing I kept closed was the bathroom door. But with au pairs? More of a challenge finding the right space between being closed and […]

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Three Types of Host Moms: Which one are you?

by cv harquail August 15, 2014
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I have a theory:  Every new host mom starts off with a vision of herself as being one of three types: The Bestie, The SecondMom, or The Boss. The Bestie The Bestie is the host mom who wants to be her au pair’s good friend. She treats the au pair like a guest, buys her […]

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Creepy, Crawly, Contagious Things- What if your Au Pair catches them too?

by cv harquail July 27, 2014
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(Reposted from our archives, since an Au Pair Asked…) When I became a mom I knew that that I would need to become accustomed to dealing with things that, pre-motherhood, had completely grossed me out. I’m talking about poopy diapers, vomit, bloody noses, fart jokes, and public belching. These were things that I would have […]

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When Your New and Old Au Pairs Get Jealous of Each Other

by cv harquail July 6, 2014
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How hard is it to see the incoming au pair making connections with the kids, settling into the AuPair room, learning to drive in the USA, and talking about all she’s going to do in her year of adventure? If you’re the host mom, it’s not hard at all– you *want* to see this. But if […]

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Fun for the 4th: Bake a Flag Cake

by cv harquail July 1, 2014
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Does your Au Pair like to bake? Do your kids? If you’ve ever made a checkerboard cake, a heart-shaped cake, or a cake-like thing that looked vaguely like Thomas The Tank Engine, you have all the skills and equipment you need to make this very American beauty. The flag-making process and recipe come from the […]

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