Foundations & Basics

Halloween Fun for Au Pairs and Host Kids

by cv harquail October 30, 2015

Every holiday gives your kids and your au pair a chance to work together, have fun and build memories with holiday-related crafts and activities. Cultural sharing and just plain ‘ole relationship-building happens in the doing of things. Given that Halloween is one of the trio of secular, nation wide cultural holidays (the other two being Thanksgiving and […]

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My Host Mom Hits Her Child — what should Au Pair Do?

by cv harquail October 19, 2015

Au Pairs are very aware that they are expected to follow the parenting philosophy of their host parents. Au Pairs have to ‘get over’ cultural differences and differences in family tradition that suggest a particular way to handle a situation. Usually, Au Pairs draw on their own cultures’ and families’ parenting practices when they find […]

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When Your Au Pair Eats “Too Much”

by cv harquail October 2, 2015

When you sign up for an Au Pair, you imagine your grocery bills to get about 20% larger. What’s incremental — beyond what you’re already buying — is another adult size portion of the main foods — another 8 oz of meat for each entree, 7 more bowls of cereal, another 3/4 of a gallon […]

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If Host Parents Can’t Respect Au Pair Contract Rules, Nothing Else Matters

by cv harquail September 16, 2015

For international Au Pairs/ Host Families Outside the USA There’s a hierarchy of requirements for a good Au Pair & Host Parent relationship. Much like Maslow’s famous Hierarchy of Needs, you can’t achieve the higher levels of a good relationship without the basics being there first. Au Pairs and Host Parents ultimately have different hierarchies, […]

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The Weirdest Stuff Can Work Sometimes with Au Pair Host Kids

by cv harquail September 3, 2015

House Elves Encore Presentations Arm Wrestling to decide who gets to decide. Sometimes the sillier you make it, the easier it is for kids to just roll with the concept. In our family, the House Elves are the ones who don’t actually clean up after everyone. They are supposed to, but they don’t. The kids […]

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When What Host Parents Want Isn’t Quite What Host Parents Do

by cv harquail September 1, 2015

Sometimes I look at my Au Pair handbook and roll my eyes. It is more fantasy than reality. More aspirational than actual. I look at the way I’ve described our family life: “We’re a fun loving family who enjoys playing together“, and I think of all the times I’d have preferred to stay on the […]

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What’s the Best Way to Instruct Your Au Pair?

by cv harquail August 28, 2015

gary-larson-far-side-cartoon-what-we-say-to-dogs-blah-blah-ginger

“Blah blah blah blah blah.” There must be hundreds of Au Pairs out there who can appreciate this FarSide cartoon by Gary Larsen.** A Host Parent’s constant instruction can quickly become just background noise. Possibly interesting, possibly important, but rarely punctuated by anything that grabs your attention. And we Host Parents have SO much to say, […]

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Teach Your Au Pair with Examples of Things Done Wrong– by Other People.

by cv harquail August 14, 2015

When teaching an Au Pair, it’s better to show than to tell. Whenever you can, point out when something is being done well or done right by your Au Pair, by your spouse, or by someone else. “I love that this nanny is putting the kids into the car from the curb, and not out […]

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Two Kids, One Baby and a New Au Pair: Overload!

by cv harquail August 11, 2015

Where do I start? writes 2K1BabyHM I’ve scoured your site for advice (and found tons!). I’ve made notes of tips and things to discuss with my new AP, but I still have some questions and I wonder if AuPairMom readers can help me out… AP3 has just started – nearly a week ago – but I […]

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3 Ways to Help Your Au Pair Break A Texting Addition

by cv harquail July 28, 2015

… at least while s/he is On Duty caring for your kids. SmartPhone addiction isn’t a metaphor– people actually get hooked on the physical rush of receiving a text. Like Pavlov’s dogs, a simple ‘ping’ starts them salivating for a connection with another person. Another person on the other side of the smart phone, though. […]

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