Cultural Exchange Challenges

Establishing Expectations when an Au Pair Has Guests

by cv harquail November 30, 2011

There’s something about hosting a friend of relative of your au pair that can mess with the fine balance between “part of the family”& “childcare provider” and between “host mom” and “house elf/slave”. For lots of us, we forget to check our assumptions about how we should act towards other people’s guests, how much of […]

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Christmas & Holidays with your Au Pair: Post round-up

by cv harquail November 25, 2011

The Christmas & Holiday season is now officially upon us — just in time to work off that second slice of pumpkin pie. I think I’m finally figuring out how to do these seasonal celebrations — I’ve got the weekly countdown calendar planner out again. We’ve sent out party invitations and even bought cases of […]

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Who counts as an “American” family?

by cv harquail September 19, 2011

I imagine that every au pair has an idea of what her or his “ideal” host family should be like. The assortment of children, the family’s location, their personality, their basic household rules… all of this factors in. But how much do you think it matters that the family be “American”-American, rather than German-American or […]

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Hurricanes? Emergencies?

by cv harquail August 26, 2011

Our Swedish au pair got off Skype with a friend back home in Stockholm last evening as we made dinner, looking rather gray and scared. She asked us to tell her which laws that had been changed now because of Hurricane Irene, and were we allowed to be walking around after dark.

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Struggling to Communicate With Host Dad

by cv harquail August 5, 2011

Every host parent has his or her own approach to interacting with their au pair. Our personalities affect some of this, but even more important is who has taken which role in the host parents – au pair relationship. When adults team up to become parents, homemakers and breadwinners, they divvy up these roles so […]

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Travel Outside the USA … Paperwork-related cautionary tale

by cv harquail May 10, 2011

Sometimes no matter how many different sources we check, we don’t get enough information to make international travel with our au pairs go without a hitch. JamaicaMom sent this story, and wonders if there was some stone she left unturned, some box she failed to check, some egg that failed to hatch, some colloqualisim that […]

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Can you help your Au Pair use her free time more wisely?

by cv harquail May 4, 2011

Have you ever been slightly envious of your au pair’s year of adventure? There have been many times that I’ve wondered what I mgiht have been like had I been an au pair (or an exchange student) and had the chance to live somewhere so different, make different friends, try new things, and experiment with […]

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How risky is it to travel when her J-1 Visa is soon to expire?

by cv harquail March 17, 2011

Smart Risks vs. Risky Risks Everything is risky, including traveling with your au pair outside of the US while she is on a J-1 visa. We know from previous conversations that even though a visa may still be valid, a customs person could deny your au pair re-entry into the USA. But how real is […]

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Will a Host Family Take Me if I Struggle with English?

by cv harquail December 3, 2010

We got this question from a potential au pair — Aupair mom, It is nice to find a place like these, at the moment im I am in the early stages of my application as Aupair in America. i have been reading a lot of posts, and it have been very interesting and helpful. To […]

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My Au Pair has Awful Table Manners

by cv harquail December 2, 2010

Dear AuPairMom Readers — What do you do when your (otherwise great, fabulous) AP has ATROCIOUS table manners – think smacking and chewing sounds not even heard at a trucker convention! Chews with mouth open, talks with mouth full of food, slurps drinks, smacks lips when chewing….it is REALLY LOUD. It is also setting a […]

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