Common Challenges

When Your Au Pair Connects With Everyone But You

by cv harquail July 30, 2015
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Not every Au Pair hits it off with every family member. Sometimes there’s a kid or a parent for whom the Au Pair’s personality is a perfect fit. Sometimes the Au Pair is ‘primed’ to listen to one parent over the other because of the Au Pair’s own family history. Sometimes the Au Pair’s home […]

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3 Ways to Help Your Au Pair Break A Texting Addition

by cv harquail July 28, 2015
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… at least while s/he is On Duty caring for your kids. SmartPhone addiction isn’t a metaphor– people actually get hooked on the physical rush of receiving a text. Like Pavlov’s dogs, a simple ‘ping’ starts them salivating for a connection with another person. Another person on the other side of the smart phone, though. […]

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Responding to Surprise Request From Departing, So-So Au Pair

by cv harquail July 24, 2015
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Speaking of Au Pairs and a sense of Entitlement, Washingtomom writes:  Our Au Pair just sprung what I hope will be her last ‘surprise’ request of us. How should I respond? We are at the end of our AP’s year, final date is August 7th. She extended with another family and the supposed start date […]

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When Your Previously Swell Au Pair Starts Acting Entitled

by cv harquail July 18, 2015
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Earlier we had a conversation about whether or not au pairs in the USA were, as a group, starting to act more entitled than in earlier times.  By “entitled” we mean, dissatisfied with a situation where the family follows the rules, offers the au pair a car, feeds the au pair well, and aims to […]

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How To Resolve Middle-School “Drama” with Your Au Pair and Host Kids

by cv harquail July 1, 2015
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I laughed with recognition of the dynamics in this Host Mom’s comment– who hasn’t seen their Au Pair and their kid(s)-of-a-certain-age get into  squabbles just like 7th graders fighting over who gets to sit where in the cafeteria? FubolHostMom writes: … I’ve got a concern regarding the “attitude” issue. Over summer vacation, issues that were […]

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My Brother is Dating My Au Pair – Against My Wishes

by cv harquail June 15, 2015
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Usually it helps to think about your Au Pair as ‘part of the family’. S/he lives with you, sees what’s behind the scenes, and knows some of your family drama.  Because we do integrate our Au Pairs into our family lives, situations come up that– were s/he a live-out nanny or part time babysitter — would […]

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What are a Host Family’s Responsibilities for Au Pair Medical Claims?

by cv harquail June 13, 2015
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Seems like it’s the season for medical and health concerns. Here’s another recent wrinkle of the question– what are a Host Family’s responsibilities for an Au Pair’s medical expenses? I am writing because I find myself in a tough spot and our former au pair in an even tougher spot. Our Au Pair ended her […]

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When Dental Drama Threatens Your Au Pair’s Extension

by cv harquail June 4, 2015
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Dental insurance in the USA is pretty crummy.  Or at least the insurance we have is — I swear that there’s never a procedure that’s completely covered or enough coverage to make it through the year.  I supposed I should take this up with the HR department? But I guess I should be happy that we […]

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Have Au Pairs Come to Expect Too Much? (Poll)

by cv harquail May 29, 2015
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A few weeks ago I raised the question:  How Have Au Pair Host Parents -As A Group- Changed Over Time?   BeachTown HostMom wrote to pose the other side of the question — (How) Have Au Pair expectations changed over time?   She writes: I’ve started to noticed some changes in the au pair community and […]

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Welcome Your Au Pair With a Fully-Stocked Bathroom

by cv harquail May 24, 2015
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When your au pair arrives in your home, the way that you’ve prepared for their arrival can say a lot about how excited you are to get to know them. We’re all away of the basic things we should have ready —  a clean, happy bedroom, a freshly printed handbook, a personalized map,  a training schedule, […]

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