Common Challenges

Thanksgiving Thoughts about Gratitude

by cv harquail November 24, 2015
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[Two years ago we enjoyed this post on gratitude, and au pairs. Since there are so many new and different readers of the blog now, that I thought I’d post it again.  Following up this post is a chance to reflect what you’re thankful and grateful for in your host family- au pair relationship.  cv] […]

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Au Pair with Eating Disorder – Should She Leave Early?

by cv harquail November 14, 2015
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We’re a little sensitive here at AuPairMom about the subject of eating disorders among young women. Some of us Moms have struggled with them, and some of us have children who have had or are currently working through eating disorders. So, as we go forward with this conversation, please be especially thoughtful.  A brand new […]

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Water-Conserving Host Parents Challenge Au Pair Cleanliness Preferences

by cv harquail November 11, 2015
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My host parents are very, very concerned about conserving water. We live in a part of the US (not California) where there has been a normal amount of rainfall– so a lack of actual water is not the reason. In the house, the bathroom sinks have no hot water. I have to wash my hands […]

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Layers of Au Pair Problems…Leading to Rematch?

by cv harquail November 9, 2015
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This Host Mom’s got it all falling apart. Little seems to be going as expected. When this Host Mom emailed, I’d suggested to her that maybe it would be easier if we separated the topics and had one post for #1 and another for #2 & #3– but they feel too connected in the Host Mom’s […]

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When Another Au Pair is Dating a Drug Dealer

by cv harquail November 4, 2015
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It’s a classic case with a new wrinkle — What’s classic:   Your Au Pair’s friend, who is also an Au Pair, is doing something unsafe. Your Au Pair told you about it, because she’s worried. And she should be worried, since the Au Pair’s friend is putting herself and her group of Au Pairs in […]

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Halloween Fun for Au Pairs and Host Kids

by cv harquail October 30, 2015
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Every holiday gives your kids and your au pair a chance to work together, have fun and build memories with holiday-related crafts and activities. Cultural sharing and just plain ‘ole relationship-building happens in the doing of things. Given that Halloween is one of the trio of secular, nation wide cultural holidays (the other two being Thanksgiving and […]

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Gentle Ways to Let Go of Your Departed Au Pair

by cv harquail October 24, 2015
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Letting go of an Au Pair you’ve loved having as part of your family can be really, really hard. Really hard. Of course, it’s a nice problem to have … but it’s still a challenge. After all, you’ve had a wonderful year with your Au Pair — s/he’s been happy, the kids have been happy, you’ve been […]

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Welcoming Your New Au Pair While You Say Goodbye To Your Former Au Pair.

by cv harquail October 24, 2015
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How do you manage to welcome a new Au Pair and create room in your heart for the Au Pair in your home, while you’re still missing your former Au Pair, the one who’s gone home? This question is not so much about “overlap”, when you have two au pairs in your home. It’s more […]

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My Host Mom Hits Her Child — what should Au Pair Do?

by cv harquail October 19, 2015
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Au Pairs are very aware that they are expected to follow the parenting philosophy of their host parents. Au Pairs have to ‘get over’ cultural differences and differences in family tradition that suggest a particular way to handle a situation. Usually, Au Pairs draw on their own cultures’ and families’ parenting practices when they find […]

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Should You Tell Another Host Mom That Her Au Pair Is Planning To Bail?

by cv harquail October 12, 2015
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“It takes a village.” That’s what my mom friends and I say when we talk about seeing each other’s kids do naughty things. In my bookclub we have a actual pact– if we see something, we say something. There’s a way that this agreement can feel kindof nosy. How can you tell Violet’s mom that […]

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