Common Challenges

Au Pair Drinking Wine While On Duty: Okay or Ixnay? (Poll)

by cv harquail August 9, 2016

Dear Au Pair Mom — I have been an avid reader of your blog for awhile now and absolutely love the invaluable information and tips I have learned from it. I’m not entirely sure this is an issue but I think it has the potential to become one so I guess I’m just putting some […]

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Interviewing Rematch Au Pairs: Special Questions?

by cv harquail August 3, 2016

How to Interview Au Pair Candidates is the #1 topic that people search for on AuPairMom. This week, I’ve been hard at work on an eBook that can offer all the ideas in one place and one package. It’s insane, trying to pull together (as much as is humanly possible) the wisdom that’s accumulated here […]

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How Many is Too Many Household Accidents Before Rematching an Au Pair?

by cv harquail July 30, 2016

I’d say however many it took to get you to write this email, SafetyConsciousHostMom. Any email that asks “how many kitchen fires are too many?” gets my automatic reply “Rematch Now”. We are a family with an 18 year old bro pair who’s been so-so. He’s not super great with the kids or the chores, but […]

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Choosing an Au Pair: The Serious One or The Fun One?

by cv harquail July 25, 2016

“There’s a lid for every pot”, we often say here on Au Pair Mom. No matter how weird your situation, or how picky you are, there is an au pair out there for you. Sometimes you’re lucky and you discover TWO au pairs who seem to fit your needs. So, how do you choose? The […]

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Should I Tell the Other Host Family Their Au Pair Is Leaving Early? (Poll)

by cv harquail July 7, 2016

Dear AuPairMom — My au pair’s good friend here is an au pair as well. According to my AP, the friend is scheduled to work for her host family for a year but will be leaving a few weeks early. The problem? The Au Pair hasn’t told her Host Family that she’s leaving, even though […]

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When & Why Do You Really Need an Au Pair Who Can Swim?

by cv harquail June 25, 2016

A new host mom sent a long email about several challenges she’s experiencing with her Au Pair (and we’ll get to them in the next week or two). Her concern about her new Au Pair’s swimming skills stood out to me, maybe because my neighbors down the street — with a new au pair– have […]

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How Can We Develop a Connection with our Socially Detached Au Pair?

by cv harquail June 4, 2016

The Goldilocks Conundrum Your connection with your Au Pair is too heavy, or it’s non-existant. Your Au Pair is either a homebody, sticking close to the house demonstrating little interest in the world around her/him. Or, your Au Pair is always gone — whether physically or socially. S/he does the job, and then disappears. We […]

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What Kinds of Relationships Do Au Pairs Want With Host Parents?

by cv harquail May 1, 2016

There are many different types of equally good relationships that we host parents can have with our au pairs. Good host parent- au pair relationships can vary by — their level of intimacy (e.g., seriously close or pleasantly distant), — the amount of time we spend together (e.g., every waking moment or “I’m off duty, see you tomorrow, […]

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How Soon To Schedule Au Pair’s First Day Off?

by cv harquail April 24, 2016

Venturing into the grey areas of Au Pair regulations and scheduling, a First Time Host Mom asks– how many days might a brand new au pair work before she must be given a day off? (I phrased it differently in the headline of this post, but essentially it’s the same question). She’s thinking about […]

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Is Two Weeks Enough To Time To Know We Need A Rematch? When I say “Yes”

by cv harquail April 23, 2016

When a new Au Pair arrives and is clearly not working out, sensible Host Parents start thinking about rematch. If the Au Pair does something unsafe, dishonest, or mean — ask for rematch right away. With other situations, it makes more sense to give it a little time. You might think your au pair is […]

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