Common Challenges

When your Au Pair confides in you … about something awful

by cv harquail June 11, 2010

This is a heavy topic for a Friday. Apologies in advance. I’ve mentioned before that I believe that there are just as many young people who become au pairs to escape something as there are those who become au pairs to find something. Au Pairs who are escaping are fleeing from acute personal disappointments, painful […]

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10 Days of Work that Might Surprise Your Au Pair

by cv harquail June 7, 2010

What’s most surprising thing for Au Pairs to learn about Memorial Day, July 4th and Labor Day? A. They mark the beginning, middle and end of “summer”. B. They are celebrated with barbecues and maybe some nice cold beer. C. They are days when most Americans have “off” but most Au Pairs do not. Answer? […]

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The Three Phone Calls I Want to Get From My Au Pair at 2 am

by cv harquail June 3, 2010

I’ve had too much to drink and I can’t drive home safely. Can you come and get me? My friend has had too much to drink and she can’t drive us home safely. Can you come and get us? I don’t feel safe and I don’t know how to get home. Can you come and […]

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Au Pair Guidelines: Does your car have a curfew? (Poll)

by cv harquail June 2, 2010

Our au pair car was a naughty, naughty car. Its very first year as an au pair car, it often stayed out kind of late. Once, it got left behind at a bar and didn’t make it back until Monday. Another time, it was hanging out 95 miles away from home, without permission, and tangled […]

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In Loco Parentis? Your Parental Responsibilities when your AP’s behavior challenges your values

by cv harquail June 1, 2010

As Host Parents, we have an odd role in our Au Pair’s lives. We are responsible for keeping them safe, housed, fed, and supported in their work with our children. And we also often play a role that I call Pseudo In Loco Parentis. Pseudo In Loco Parentis Like the fancy Latin? Years ago, women’s […]

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The Best $98 You Can Spend on Your New Au Pair

by cv harquail May 20, 2010

One of the best things a host parent can do with a new au pair is to pay some professional driving lessons. Driving lessons are something that you should consider in addition to having the au pair go out driving with one or more host parents, and in addition to having the au pair study […]

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4 Ways to Reduce “Seasonal Schedule Shift Syndrome”

by cv harquail May 18, 2010

Seasonal Schedule Shift Syndrome: AuPairMom’s fancy name for “when your au pair gets grumpy because all of a sudden the whole schedule changes, and now s/he has to work an occasional Saturday night.” When school ends and ‘summertime’ begins, family schedules change. Rhythms for your kids’ days may change, as may your own work schedules. […]

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When you need some time alone … with your kids, without the Au Pair

by cv harquail May 17, 2010

‘SotaGal commented last week about, sometimes, she just wants to be with her kids, alone. “Mommy-a-mano”, no DH, no DP, no AP. Just Mom & the kids. There is nothing wrong with that. We all want 1 on 1/2/3 time, time when we are the only adult in the room, the only adult in the […]

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Realizing you aren’t ready to be Au Pair host parents? And you have an Au Pair?

by cv harquail May 12, 2010

If we only knew then what we know now… being an Au Pair Host Parent would be really easy. Okay, easier. As our au pair parenting experiences unfold, we learn a lot about what works and what doesn’t, what we can change and what we can’t, how we can accommodate to an au pair and […]

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Since she’s temporarily returned to the nest– can I still give my (former) Au Pair advice?

by cv harquail May 10, 2010

Funny how, once an au pair has become part of your life, he or she stays part of your life. Many au pairs go home or on to their next adventure, and we don’t really hear from them again. Others keep in touch with birthday cards and Facebook, and with some we are lucky to […]

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