Common Challenges

What if we don’t follow through to rematch, when we said we would?

by cv harquail November 19, 2010

One of the most important lessons I learned when my kids were toddlers, and one of the important lessons I’ve tried to impart to our au pairs, is that actions have consequences. If we said no drawing on the wall and you drew on the wall, well then you would not be able to use […]

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Our Au Pair Wants More Vacation: How to handle?

by cv harquail November 13, 2010

Every au pair gets two weeks paid vacation, and the convention is to have the host family choose one week, while the au pair chooses the other, subject to family agreement. The host family has slightly more ‘say’ about vacation scheduling, simply because the host parents need to arrange for childcare while the au pair […]

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Eating Out at Restaurants: Advice for Host Families and Au Pairs

by cv harquail November 11, 2010

Our rocking, sane and helpful conversation about all things related to food at home has emboldened me (and maybe you) to tackle a specific food situation– eating out at restaurants. I’m thinking about the evenings when no one has the energy to cook and you’re tired of pizza, or when you’re dining ‘on the road’ […]

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Why is managing food for an Au Pair so hard?

by cv harquail November 8, 2010

Why do we have so many comments, questions and challenges with this one? We already know that: food is love food is cultural healthy food is important we must distinguish between everyday food and special food we need to be explicit if any foods are off limits to the au pair we need to allow […]

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Au Pair Asks: How should I expect to act around my Host Family?

by cv harquail November 6, 2010

Dear Au Pair Moms, What is an acceptable way to act around the host family? is it more like a work environment, or would, for instance, an au pair treat the host mom like a real mom, and tell her most things about her social life outside of the au-pairing job? Is it common for […]

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My Child Doesn’t Want an Au Pair (and we need to have one). Ideas?

by cv harquail November 2, 2010

I am a single HM, with a wonderful, but very strong willed 5yr old girl. We had our first AP in June for 10 weeks this year to see how it worked for us and to cover the 6 wk school holidays. I had previously had a month off work sick, but normally work full […]

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What to Wear? asks the Au Pair

by cv harquail November 2, 2010

I know we had a conversation a while back when a host mom’s au pair was dressing link a tramp a little “inappropriately”, but I thought we could revisit that conversion from a more positive direction, thinking about what we’d recommend. We received this email from a soon-to-be au pair: I am a 20 year […]

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Halloween Party Safety Concerns for my Au Pair

by cv harquail October 28, 2010

Halloween is a favorite holiday of… just about everyone. I think it has become a quintessential American experience that every Au Pair should get involved in. But how should they get involved? Handing out candy at the house? Taking your kids out to trick or treat? Helping to make costumes? Or getting involved in the […]

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How can I get my Au Pair to CALM DOWN! Guest Post by CalifMom

by CalifMom October 27, 2010

[Even though she’s out on the edge here, I had to tell you that this was written by CalifMom. Of course, you’ll recognize her voice, but I want to make sure she gets public credit because she’s so damn darn funny. That said, do NOT give this momma a hard time about her *&^$ and […]

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When Grandma Interferes in the Au Pair-Host Parent Relationship

by cv harquail October 25, 2010

The only people who should be involved in the relationship between the Au Pair and his or her Host Parents are the au pair and the host parents. The au pair should get instruction and feedback directly from the parents, and the parents should focus on the au pair’s experiences with the family and the […]

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