Common Challenges

Christmas & Holidays with your Au Pair: Post round-up

by cv harquail November 25, 2011
balloon highway.jpg

The Christmas & Holiday season is now officially upon us — just in time to work off that second slice of pumpkin pie. I think I’m finally figuring out how to do these seasonal celebrations — I’ve got the weekly countdown calendar planner out again. We’ve sent out party invitations and even bought cases of […]

1 comment Read the full article →

Holiday Cards: Do you include your Au Pair in the family photo? (Poll)

by cv harquail November 14, 2011
__mmBw3uzPnJI_TQn9GfgWReI_AAAAAAAB0-M_Mwn-OrnMA_M_s1600_family_christmas_card_03.jpg

Don’t you love getting holiday cards from friends, especially when the cards have a photo of their whole family? We have so many friends who live so far away that the only chance I get to see how their kids are growing is from the holiday card photos.  Plus, I love to put them on […]

14 comments Read the full article →

Damage to the Au Pair Room: Should we have a security deposit?

by cv harquail November 2, 2011
4398199414_8fe58fdbe2.jpg

We’ve had some funny and not so funny stories about damage to our homes by au pairs who were clueless (at best), careless (most often) and intentionally destructive (nightmare). Everything from soaked ceilings under the au pair bathroom, to hair dye on the bathroom walls, to nail polish on the fancy sheets. We have a decent handle on what to expect […]

16 comments Read the full article →

Help: We Need Our Au Pair to Grow Up

by cv harquail October 28, 2011
1490657629_3abb4fc89f_b.jpg

Au Pairs mature a lot during their year(s) in our homes. Most of them become more independent, more worldly, more self-confident, and more self-directed. They pretty much have to grow, since the challenges of living in another country, with another family, with responsibility for childcare are just to much for an immature person to handle […]

39 comments Read the full article →

Invasion of Privacy: Time for rematch?

by cv harquail October 19, 2011
2841536156_9aaa63a456_b.jpg

Here at AuPairMom we get some very interesting emails from host parents and au pairs facing challenges in their relationships. Sometimes these questions are easy to answer, other times the whole group of us has to band together to come up with useful advice. Sometimes these emails make me sad — so much struggle, such […]

68 comments Read the full article →

Too Much Generosity or the Wrong Kind? Trust your heart

by cv harquail October 8, 2011
4076917678_26f70d8c6b_o (1).jpg

Dear AuPairMom- The posting from the host mom offering the fancy host family situation make me think of the choices that I made when I was matching with my host family. I talked to many different families. All of them had some different things to offer, cars yes or no, no Saturday nights, babies and […]

6 comments Read the full article →

Too Good to be True?

by cv harquail October 7, 2011
201110070947.jpg

A while ago I got a request for advice — a host mom was mystified that her desired au pair candidates seemed uninterested in the opportunity she had to offer. After all, what au pair wouldn’t want a situation that required only 20 hours per week, paid vacations with the family, her own apartment underneath […]

71 comments Read the full article →

Interpreting the Lanugage of Lag Time: Emailing Prospective Au Pairs

by cv harquail September 27, 2011
5073785421_6bd6874449_b.jpg

It’s kind of ironic for me to post a query about the topic of how to interpret the lag time between sending an email and an au pair candidate responding. As several of you with whom I correspond with on email already know– I can be “not very prompt” in my replies. What does this […]

53 comments Read the full article →

Is it fair to schedule an Au Pair for Late Night baby feedings?

by cv harquail August 31, 2011
115546916_2ba6138d36_o.jpg

The help we need is the help we need. Depending on your situation as a host parent, you might need driving, or cooking help, or child-minding on weekends, or flexibility when a child is sick. We each ask our au pairs to help us with different childcare tasks. As long as the tasks are within […]

90 comments Read the full article →

Best Practices: Scheduling an Au Pair with a Stay-At-Home Mom

by cv harquail August 21, 2011
201108211428.jpg

We don’t really have a good term to describe moms who work in the home taking care of their home & family 24/7. Personally, I’m not a fan of the label “stay at home” mom, because it sounds like a command (Stay at home, mom!). And while work-at-home mom is descriptive– she’s a mom, working […]

11 comments Read the full article →