Caring for children

How to Sabotage the Au Pair’s Authority By Refusing To Discipline Your Kids

by cv harquail February 25, 2014

When I look around troubling dynamics in the au pair — host child– host parent relationship triangle, I see three Host Parent behaviors that seem to set everyone up to fail: 1. Parents undercutting the au pairs authority, especially by reversing decisions. 2. Parents skimming all the good chores, events and behaviors, leaving the au […]

51 comments Read the full article →

Is it a Personality Thing, or a Training Thing, or Some Other Thing?

by cv harquail October 6, 2013

Even when we don’t have enough information about the ‘real’ problem between a host parent and an au pair, the action steps are the same: 1. Check your expectations, 2. Talk with each other candidly, and 3. Give each other a chance to change. Here’s an email from a host mom having trouble: Dear Au Pair Mom Readers, […]

57 comments Read the full article →

Is There a Sensible Way Around “Infant Care” Restrictions?

by cv harquail September 14, 2013

This question is a great one for Local Counselors to answer– have you had experience with this issue? Dear Au Pair Moms ~~ We have found a prospective au pair who is just great and seem like she would fit perfectly into our family. She has been in the USA with another family and […]

49 comments Read the full article →

When Host Parents Start Working ‘At Home’: Helping your au pair make the switch

by cv harquail April 2, 2013

Given all the work that we put into matching our family situation with just the right au pair, it can feel pretty painful when– all of a sudden– your family situation changes. Adopting a baby, getting a divorce, moving across the country, moving to a new house starting home renovations, getting a dog, … you get […]

9 comments Read the full article →

Child Care Chores Quiz: Are any chores on this list off limits?

by cv harquail January 16, 2013

What actually counts as a legitimate Child Care Chore? Do we routinely ask our Au Pairs to do chores that are not really legitimate Child Care Chores? HostMcMom sent me a list of things on her au pair’s ChildCare Chores list. As I looked over her list, I wondered about an item or two that […]

54 comments Read the full article →

On Duty or Off Duty: There is no third choice. Or is there?

by cv harquail December 29, 2012

ON Duty or OFF Duty. There are only two choices for the hours on your au pair’s schedule. Host parents that try to establish a third choice, where an au pair is neither on duty nor off duty, are starting down the slippery slope of “taking advantage” of an au pair. ON Duty = Paid […]

92 comments Read the full article →

Help Your Au Pair Plan for a Fun Summer

by cv harquail June 17, 2012

As per usual, the summer has snuck up on me. Even though Target is already setting up the ‘back to school’ supplies display, I still haven’t gotten all the swimsuits and suncreen out of storage. And this week marks the last day of school! Thank goodness we have only one week of unstructured vacation days […]

5 comments Read the full article →

Choosing An Au Pair For Teenage Host Children

by cv harquail March 1, 2012

Host parents have been wondering about continuing with Au Pair caregivers as their children become teenagers. While we discussed this question a while ago, the children of many of the regular and newer members of the community have gotten older, and so the topic is newly hot. [See the earlier posts: Beyond the Chauffeur: Benefits of […]

Read the full article →

Au Pair Asks: What if I’m not really prepared to handle these kids?

by cv harquail February 20, 2012

Dear Au Pair Mom, I really love to read your blog, and have been reading it for a few months now, back when I started on my quest to become an Au Pair. And now for the first time I’m writing to you for advice. I have just moved to my host family and have […]

30 comments Read the full article →

How to Help Your Au Pair Connect With Your Kids

by cv harquail July 9, 2011

How do you want your au pair to interact with your children? We spend a lot of time in our handbooks and meeting going over the house rules and general family principles, but often we leave implicit our our expectations for day-to-day kid – au pair interaction. Sure, we want each au pair-kid combo to […]

12 comments Read the full article →

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →