Caring for children

Share The Fun and the Not-So-Fun with Your Au Pair

by cv harquail November 11, 2014

Prompted by our conversation over the weekend about the au pair who was unhappy with the ratio of chores-to-child interaction in his work week, I’m reposting something from 2009: One super-helpful piece of advice my friend Adelaide gave me when we got our first au pair was “Be Sure to Share the Cream.” Share both […]

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Childcare vs. Child Chores: What’s a fair balance for an Au Pair?

by cv harquail November 7, 2014

An Au Pair’s primary role is child care– as in, caring for the actual child. Virtually no young adult comes to the US for a year to do a kid’s laundry, make the kid’s bed, or clean splashed applesauce off the kitchen floor. While the child-related housework chores are certainly part of the tasks […]

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3 Reasons To Get A Flu Shot- with your Au Pair

by cv harquail November 3, 2014

Cold’n sneezy season. I have just returned from CVS, where I bought zinc lozenges, throat spray, tissues, Ricola, and sudafed. And, I got a flu shot. There’s nothing you can do about a cold– just deal with it, wash your hands, and move on. But the flu? The real, honest-to-goodness slay-you-with-sickness-phlem-and-fever flu? That can be […]

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Au Pairs Should Use Language that Host Kids Can Understand

by cv harquail September 23, 2014

Many families look for au pairs who can help their children learn a language other than English. The idea is that the au pair can speak to the child in the au pair’s first language, and teach the child the second language through everyday interactions. Conceptually, this makes sense. We do, after all, learn our […]

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It’s the Parents’ Job to Teach Children Kind Behavior

by cv harquail September 18, 2014

Au Pairs can reinforce discipline and expectations, but it’s Parents who remain responsible. Many parents who are either new to parenting at all or new to host parenting specifically struggle with this issue. We all want our children to be kind. Full stop. (I’m assuming this is true. It’s true, right? We want our kids […]

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How to Get Your Au Pair Ready To Cook

by cv harquail September 12, 2014

Once your host kids get past the ‘oatmeal and smashed peas’ phase, it’s time for an Au Pair to do some real cooking. Even au pairs who’ve cooked in their home countries find cooking in America to be a bit challenging. Au Pairs need to figure out: How our appliances work What each of the foods […]

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Family Handbook Ideas for Au Pairs Caring For Infants

by cv harquail June 25, 2014

Caring for an infant, especially when the parents are brand-new to parenting, can pose special challenges for an Au Pair. Au Pairs in these situations will already be ‘infant-qualified’ — meaning that they’ve had direct experience with infants and will know how to do all the basics. But because parents are still feeling their way […]

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Au Pair Asks: My Host Family Fights. Is it okay to rematch?

by cv harquail May 8, 2014

Personally, I can’t imagine living in a family where the members actively fight with one another. It’s one thing to have sibling bickering, or to have the parents yell at each other (very) occasionally when something goes wrong. But to live in a household where people are actively hostile? That would depress me no end. […]

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Au Pair is harsh and negative with Host Kids: Can we change her interaction style?

by cv harquail March 27, 2014

Dear Au Pair Mom Community, I really need your advice about a situation I have where I don’t think “rematch” is feasible (and besides my husband is totally against it). Basically we have had an Au Pair (our 3rd) for the last 9 months. The first 6 months were great. She’s organized, responsible, a good […]

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Don’t Make Your Au Pair Do Your Kids’ Homework

by cv harquail March 8, 2014

Haven’t we all wished for someone else to do our Algebra homework? That’s normal. What’s not so normal, though, is to ask your au pair to do your 17 year old’s homework. This situation is a little outside our usual boundaries, because the au pair is in Europe (US rules don’t apply), because she has […]

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