Can this relationship be saved?

Helping Your Au Pair Navigate Health Care Costs & Insurance

by cv harquail February 24, 2014

When an au pair is injured or gets ill, their health insurance is supposed to cover their care. But sometimes managing the both getting care and getting it paid for is more than any of us can handle. Even those of us host parents who have “good” health insurance can get beaten down by […]

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My Host Mom is Snooping In My Bedroom. How can get some privacy?

by cv harquail February 18, 2014

Dear AuPair Moms –– I’d like your thoughts about managing privacy, especially with a host mom who’s a bit, shall we say, inquisitive. As an au pair, I have my own room in my host family’s house. Both my HM and HF are very private people, which I appreciate, since I am the same. […]

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We Can’t Afford Alternative Childcare While Our Au Pair’s Broken Arm Mends. What to do?

by cv harquail February 16, 2014

Dear AuPairMoms— Could we re-open a topic from August 2012 on what to do when an au pair breaks a bone, is in a cast and can’t drive? In that situation the au pair only had three weeks left, and the comments in large part were geared toward that scenario — mine’s a bit different. […]

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Host Family Abandoned My Daughter! Should she rematch, or come home?

by cv harquail February 12, 2014

Dear AuPairMoms, I’m a mom from South Africa. My dear daughter, S, has just arrived in America for a year au pairing. She completed her orientation week in New York, loving everything about it, and travelled to a nearby town to meet her Host Family last Friday. We had all been skyping the family since November and were […]

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My Host Family Thinks I’m Unreliable. Can I change their minds?

by cv harquail February 9, 2014

Dear AuPairMom- I have made a few mistakes with my host family, and I am wondering if I can fix things. I arrived in the US a little over 5 months ago. After three months I broke my wrist, needed surgery, could not do my job correctly but I got an incredible support from my […]

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Getting Back On The Right Foot When You Start Out Wrong

by cv harquail February 8, 2014

Experienced Host Parents know that when your au pair arrives, you get him or her in action right away. Right Away! Even though it’s tempting to let him/her sleep in, or to show her around your wonderful town, or to wait until his English is better before you start giving instructions on ‘how to do […]

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Do Our Careful Reviews of Au Pair Applications Actually Make A Difference?

by cv harquail February 1, 2014

Awesome Contributor and Host Mom Dorsi asks: “If you were to revisit the applications of your best and worst Au Pairs, what would you learn about making a good choice?”, Dorsi asks. Would you actually learn…. anything? The Oh-So-Wise ShouldBeWorking replies: “What kills me about how fabulous our current match is is that there was […]

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Policies for Hosting Out-Of-Town Guests: Polls

by cv harquail January 25, 2014

Let’s get a sense of how many of us have which kinds of guidelines about out-of-town guests. Take these polls, below —- but EXCLUDE romantic relationships (e.g., boyfriend or girlfriend from back home) since these have been shown to have a separate dynamic. More on that in another post. Please add details […]

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When Your Au Pair is the Neighborhood Safety Net

by cv harquail January 22, 2014

We’re on our fourth day of snow-related school closings this month, and I’m really starting to feel the burden of being the only adult working at home– in (what seems like) the whole neighborhood. For parents who work outside the home, snow days can cause a lot of childcare problems. If you have a childcare […]

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Yes, You Have Our Permission to Leave

by cv harquail December 11, 2013

or: Just Give Up Already: Au Pair’s Version Somedays, the inbox is pretty heavy. I struggle to understand just what it takes for an Au Pair to realize that — yes, her situation really IS awful — and that — yes, she really SHOULD give notice and leave as politely as possible. All you need […]

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