Comments on: What exactly is a Host Family Handbook?

By: 1st-Timer HM-to-Be

1st-Timer HM-to-Be — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 18:19:02 +0000

Thanks for the suggestions! I had used the search field and had pored over the contents of a number of the categories, but for some reason I missed the “Pages” area. As a first-time HM, while the guidelines are very helpful, samples are even more helpful, given the amount of information many host families choose to include in the handbooks; it’s a bit overwhelming to start from scratch (and I’ll even admit that I’m a professional journalist by trade!). Will continue to peruse now, especially in the “Pages.” Thanks again!

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By: cv harquail

cv harquail — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 16:42:09 +0000

1THM2B –
Just checking, did you look at the “Pages” here on the blog? There are individual handbook- guideline pages for different topics, and two examples of family handbooks…. Also, if you click on the category “guidelines” there is a ton of stuff. cv

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By: Hula Gal

Hula Gal — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 16:40:49 +0000

CV has posted a sample handbook which you can find using a link on the right of this page towards the top. I used it to get my book started about two years ago. My has become more of my own now but I thought this was a helpful starting point.

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By: 1st-Timer HM-to-Be

1st-Timer HM-to-Be — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 14:21:16 +0000

Pa Host Mom of Two APs (or any other HMs willing to share),
I’d also love to see a copy of a handbook, if anyone is willing to share! We’re expecting our first AP in just a few weeks, and while she and I have spent HOURS on Skype talking about the specifics of our sons’ schedules, info about our neighborhood, college classes, etc., I have yet to put it all in writing. Thanks in advance! Email address is mydogzuca AT hotmail DOT com.

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By: Calif Mom

Calif Mom — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 20:28:26 +0000

OOOH! Interesting that the word “guide” or “guidebook” apparently translated badly and completely undermined your goal.

I shy away from “Rule”, too, because it smacks of oppression, and I get worn down by being the bad guy all the time. Maybe using the word “Rules” is not a bad idea, though it feels harsh. But truth be told, host parents DO have some rules that must be followed, and we DO get annoyed when they aren’t followed. So why would we be anything but clear and specific when explaining that?

Being nice is hard.

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By: cafamily

cafamily — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 17:30:05 +0000

Thanks so much for this post – we are just finishing our first year with an AP and deciding about what to put in a handbook for our second one. We didn’t take it seriously the first time and now I see why we should have – after 11 months I’m having to tell her things like “Be sure the meat is cooked all the way before you feed the kids” but it is awkward and late to be telling her what to do, especially since she is shockingly uncommunicative.

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By: newbie HM

newbie HM — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 07:04:16 +0000

Pa Host Mom of 2 APs,
I would love a copy of handbook to look at! Just getting into the process and need some direction. Would great appreciate it.
carolyn.nadeau@netzero.com

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By: Should be working

Should be working — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 05:20:37 +0000

Our AP, who we got from a transition, says she only spoke once for 5 min to her first host family (who did not work out). Our agency requires minimum 2 phone calls. What kind of HPs don’t want to ask a lot of questions and get a feel for personality?

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By: Should be working

Should be working — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 00:40:02 +0000

Opposite experience here: I am very picky about what goes in the dryer–no lingerie, polyester, lycra sports gear, bathing suits, etc., but both au pairs we have had seemed to put everything in the dryer.

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By: MomaBear

MomaBear — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 06:43:49 +0000

Funny enough – my handbook is not so big – about 12 pages in bullet point – full pictures and stuff – to keep it interesting but I have devoted one section to “our personal relationship” because generally I am not too much older than my AP’s (always within 10 years).

I state quite clearly that it is obviously ridiculous for them to see me as a mom but I am not their new BBF (my handbook actually uses these words!). This is not included in my role. Sometime AP’s find it difficult to compartmentise this aspect as I am fun loving, affectionate and I laugh a lot. But I have my own friends and that is where I like to put my “friend energy”.

I ask that they try to perceive me as an older sibling – one they can turn to for advice if needed. However I am not there to fill the friend gap and it is very important that they make friends to share their experiences with.
.

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