The posting from the host mom offering the fancy host family situation make me think of the choices that I made when I was matching with my host family. I talked to many different families. All of them had some different things to offer, cars yes or no, no Saturday nights, babies and bigger children, and different kinds of town situations.
I did feel that some families tried to impress me and other au pairs by offering very many things.
Myself, I don’t come from a rich family, and yes all the benefits that host families offer are appreciated, really.
I don’t want to seem rude or have a lack in respect. There was this sense that maybe the families were not as nice as they told me they were, and that they were maybe trying to cover up for that by offering nice situations. It seemed like some families were talking a lot about the kind of car, how nice was the room, my own bathroom, but underneath they did not seem confident or warm in their hearts.
I know that we can’t really tell this from emails and skype, even with many interviews, but still we have to respect that inside sense we have of what is right for us.
I did talk to a few familys who really did seem like they had a kind of attitude where they could bribe or “buy” me. But I would not want someone who thinks can “buy me”. If a host mother talks a lot about “We are offering you this that and that how can you say no?” and also does not talk about how much se loves her kids and what kind of persons she wants to take care of them, this made me feel like I was being bought.
There are probably many au pairs who would like a very wealthy family, and that is fine. They have to find the right family for them. As for me I want a family generous with their love and their respect and their understandings. I knew that there were families like this to be found from looking at websites and from reading this blog. So I kept looking until I found a family that seemed generous in these ways.
Now that I have been an au pair for almost a year, I feel good that I made a good choice. My host family has many nice things that they share with me (and some nice things that the parents keep apart, ha ha like the fancy chocolate). But they are fair and honest and they love their kids with all their hearts. Even when we have had disagreements and not been happy with each other, we have been able to work things out.
So this is just to say — too many things can get in the way of what is really important for finding the right au pair for you.