privacy

The Worst Thing an Au Pair Can Overhear

by cv harquail March 17, 2017
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Quick — what’s the worst thing your au pair could ever overhear? You telling your Host Parent partner how much the Au Pair bothers you? Some kind of grumpy food-related complaint you should be too adult to even have? You announcing that  you’ve tucked a speed tracker into the Au Pair car, so now you’ll […]

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With Your Au Pair’s Social Life, Be Caring Not Controlling

by cv harquail January 28, 2017
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If you can trust your Au Pair with your children, can’t you trust her with her own Saturday night plans? I wondered this, when I read the email (below) from the OverMonitoredAuPair. I am a BIG believer in knowing how to find your Au Pair in an emergency during his/her off-duty time. I am a […]

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What Forever Au Pair Wishes Her Host Family Knew

by cv harquail August 10, 2015
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Forever AuPair offered this as a comment to the earlier post13 Things Your Au Pair Wishes Host Families Knew, by Janine Snyder (AuPairSis). I thought it would make a great post of its own! What I Wish My Host Family Knew 1. Support your Au pair when she disciplines your kids, even if you would have done […]

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Do you ‘overshare’ or ‘undershare’ with your Au Pair?

by cv harquail August 21, 2014
overshare

I didn’t realized what a private creature I could be until we had our first au pair. With roommates it felt like nothing was off limits, and with my DH the main thing I kept closed was the bathroom door. But with au pairs? More of a challenge finding the right space between being closed and […]

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Do you really want to know what your Au Pair is up to?

by cv harquail July 9, 2014
au pair, breaking rules, advice, secrets

‘Let me live in my fantasy world, where where Au Pairs drink only Diet Coke.’  This is what I’d say to Potential Tattletail AP. How about you? Dear AuPairMom-  I have a bit of a delicate question that I would love to get some feedback on from a HF perspective if possible.  I was an […]

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My Host Mom is Snooping In My Bedroom. How can get some privacy?

by cv harquail February 18, 2014
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Dear AuPair Moms –– I’d like your thoughts about managing privacy, especially with a host mom who’s a bit, shall we say, inquisitive.    As an au pair, I have my own room in my host family’s house. Both my HM and HF are very private people, which I appreciate, since I am the same. […]

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What do Host Parents think about Nanny Cams?: Au Pair Asks

by cv harquail May 8, 2013
kid spy

It’s been a long time since we had our last conversation about Nanny Cams. We’ve had a couple of suggestions for a post about them, but I have always resisted.   Only about 15% of host parent readers who took our poll back then reported that they even considered using a nanny cam. Personally, I […]

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Au Pair Asks: How Should I Manage My Host Dads’ Friends’ Drunken Advances?

by cv harquail December 13, 2012
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This post was actually a bit hard to fit to a short headline– the situation is a bit more complicated. As usual, culture dynamics, language issues, gender dyanmics, and more at work in this au pair’s uncomfortable situation with her host dad and his friends. What advice do you have for APinChina? Should she say […]

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Which bedroom to choose for your Au Pair?

by cv harquail September 26, 2012
girls bedroom with owl wall sticker

Lucky you- you’re not only getting an au pair, but also you have a choice of rooms for his or her bedroom!   But which bedroom should you choose– the one near the baby? The big one where s/he’d share the kids’ bathroom or the smaller one where she’d have her own bathroom? Or the […]

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Sustaining Your Au Pair’s Privacy When You Enter Her Room Without Notice

by cv harquail July 15, 2012

Au Pairs (and Host Parents) need their privacy — that’s why there are rules about the au pair’s room having an actual door (not a curtain or a screen). Pretty much the only time it’s okay to go into an au pair’s room without permission is when there is an “emergency”. Emergencies include: A/C left […]

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