personal space

Which bedroom to choose for your Au Pair?

by cv harquail September 26, 2012
girls bedroom with owl wall sticker

Lucky you- you’re not only getting an au pair, but also you have a choice of rooms for his or her bedroom!   But which bedroom should you choose– the one near the baby? The big one where s/he’d share the kids’ bathroom or the smaller one where she’d have her own bathroom? Or the […]

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Our Au Pair is Dating My Husband’s Close Friend. Now what?

by cv harquail February 4, 2012

And speaking of trying to maintain some privacy around ones adult social life, Here’s an email that has me completely stumped.  How do they stay “host parents” to their au pair, and friends with their friend, and have any separate adult social life? We really need your ideas here, folks. Dear Au Pair Mom, I […]

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“Mama Needs Her Space”

by cv harquail September 22, 2010

BLJHostMom needs to vent– “Space” has been a pretty hot topic with us (here on AuPairMom) these last few weeks, and I’d love some advice. With our first AP, our biggest worry was that she would be around and it would be awkward when we just wanted to relax and watch TV in the evenings. […]

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Au Pairs and Your Privacy: My Au Pair’s kindof nosy!

by cv harquail March 22, 2010

When invite an au pair to come live in our home and be ‘part of the family’, our lives become an open book. Frustrated with your DS? Your au pair knows. Threw out 6 bags of organic greens that decomposed in the fridge? She saw it. Hoarding Thin Mints in your special cabinet even though […]

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Au Pair Advice: She’s using *my* coffee mug!

by cv harquail March 17, 2010

We host parents can be a weird bunch. The kinds of things that drive us crazy… no wonder it can be hard for au pairs to get adjusted! Over the weekend I heard a crazy lament that I want to share with you. My friend has a new au pair, who’s been with them about […]

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Part of the Family: The Au Pairs’ Perspective

by cv harquail July 2, 2009

Okay Au Pairs– It’s your turn to chime in… and share the au pair side of the ‘part of the family’ equation. What does it mean to you to be "part of the family"? What do host families do that helps you feel "part of the family"? What do host families do that takes away […]

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Feeling Squished by Our Au Pair

by cv harquail June 23, 2009

What do you do when your au pair wants so much to be with you and your family that you never get any personal space? And, what happens when, in your efforts to be kind and generous, you continue to cede important personal space, events, and rituals to incorporate her, making your personal space smaller […]

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What are Host Dads afraid of? The Top 3 “Fears of the Host Dad” & How to manage them

by cv harquail June 25, 2008

Back when you were deciding whether to get an Au Pair, you might have encountered some resistance from your potential Host Dad. “I’m not sure I want someone else living in our house.” “Isn’t it just easier to hire a bunch of babysitters?” “Maybe you should cut back at work.” “Why can’t the kids just […]

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