I laughed out loud at the subject line of the email that sent this issue to Au Pair Mom.
It’s almost — but not quite– a luxury to imagine being bothered by a “boring” Au Pair, if this Au Pair comes on the heels of a “Flameout”, a “Party Girl”, or a “Couch Potato”. Not to mention, an “Accident Waiting To Happened”.
But I completely got it.
My perfect Au Pair is someone who’s so interested in life that s/he can’t help but be interesting to have around the house. Even if her or his interests are far from my own, a person who’s full of life brings positive energy that I really love to have around me.
I suspect I’m a lot like the Host Mom who wrote this:
We have an Au Pair who wants to extend. She is a very good Au Pair. The kids LOVE her, in their affections she is in the top 2 and maybe the top 1 out of the 7 we have had. She is playful and good with them and loves them, helps out on her off time with homework or playing and seems to do so genuinely.
I definitely would count her in the top 2 for off-the-job/family-member stuff. She drives kids around a LOT, which we told in matching was a big part of the job, and does so patiently and safely. She is pleasant, reliable, a team-player who pitches in and absolutely a good family-member type of Au Pair.
She is so-so with kid-related chores; sheet-changing is for her a long task, toy pickup doesn’t happen much, laundry seems a bit challenging but gets done eventually. She is, to be fair, no worse than our other weak-on-chores Au Pairs have been.
Here is my hesitation about extending, and it seems absurd to me and I can’t decide if or how to let it go:
DH and I find her painfully boring, annoyingly so. (The kids totally do not find her boring.) Or just annoying, I can’t tell. She has no conversation to offer that is interesting, apart from the occasional non-story about the gym or a tv show. She reads nothing, goes out maybe twice a week. She is totally pleasant at dinner but is just without anything to contribute.
I can’t figure out what bugs me so much but she is just DULL.
Our higher-drama Au Pairs at least were entertaining to me, with their heartbreaks and family stories. I remember when we finished our year with the last high-drama Au Pair I said I wanted a great Au Pair with kids, with no drama–and that is what I have. And the dullness is painful!
Still, if kids are SO happy with this Au Pair, and the job performance is quite good (apart from chores it’s outstanding), what is my problem??
I’m debating trying to ramp up the chore performance to see if that would make me like the Au Pair better. But frankly I wouldn’t extend with this one mainly for the annoying-boring quality. Which seems like a silly reason!!
Last note: With each Au Pair, by February I was noting that it is with good reason that we only keep them for 1 year. Each one has gotten on my nerves for different reasons–laziness, grumpiness, drama. So maybe it’s “just that time of year”??