Au Pair Departs in a Huff, Then Moves In Next Door

by cv harquail February 20, 2017
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This LongIslandHostMom’s experience triggered PTSD for me.  All the feels. The ugly, angry resentful feels. All I could think about, after I readLongIslandHostMom’s email, was how awful it had been to run into our former, “flame out” au pair, when she showed up for a BBQ at my friend’s beach house with my friend’s nanny, acting […]

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When You Discover Your Au Pair was Driving Under the Influence

by cv harquail February 11, 2017
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Readers, I can’t really preface this one with anything but a request for some wisdom — Dear Au Pair Mom — We have just had an au pair debacle that we are trying to sort through and I was wondering if anyone has any advice. Our au pair asked to use our car to go […]

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Teach Kids to Apologize to The Au Pair

by cv harquail February 6, 2017

Hosting an Au Pair presents us with one opportunity after another to teach our children how to be kind. In many of our conversations here on the blog, we worry about being kind proactively. As adults, we Host Parents spend a lot of time thinking about how to be kind to our Au Pairs, to […]

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How to find South American/ Central American Au Pairs that fit our family’s style

by cv harquail January 30, 2017
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Hello Au Pair Moms! I am in search of our 3rd au pair, perhaps someone from Central or Latin America.  We really loved the German Au Pair we had, and would love another just like her… but I’ve noticed the European Au Pairs are not as available. I live in Chicago, which has a large Hispanic […]

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With Your Au Pair’s Social Life, Be Caring Not Controlling

by cv harquail January 28, 2017
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If you can trust your Au Pair with your children, can’t you trust her with her own Saturday night plans? I wondered this, when I read the email (below) from the OverMonitoredAuPair. I am a BIG believer in knowing how to find your Au Pair in an emergency during his/her off-duty time. I am a […]

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How to Help Your Au Pair Appreciate the “Au Pair Car”

by cv harquail January 20, 2017
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We all want to be generous, and we all want to be appreciated. And, there’s nothing like having a third car for your au pair to use to make you aware of the tension that can exist when you want to be generous and want to be appreciated. When we bought our first Volvo wagon […]

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Au Pairs, Don’t Even THINK About Driving For Uber

by cv harquail January 18, 2017
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When I saw the first mention of this in the comments several weeks ago, I was surprised. Au Pairs driving the Host Family car as a second job? What Au Pair would even presume s/he could use the Host Parents car to drive on off-duty hours to earn some extra money? With the Host Parents’ car?  […]

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Choosing an Au Pair from Her Video: An example for your feedback

by cv harquail January 14, 2017

A prospective Au Pair from South America emailed last week– she has applied to be an Au Pair with Cultural Care, but hasn’t found a family.   She’s wondering — is there anything about her video that might be turning families off? Is there anything she could do to improve her video? I don’t want to […]

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How to Make the Most of the #WomensMarch on Washington or Anywhere: Tips from Feminist Activists

by cv harquail January 13, 2017

In a rare bit of cross-posting, I want to share with you something I wrote for my consulting blog at FeministsAtWork.  I know that not everyone in the AuPairMom community is interested in progressive US politics, so for some of you this post won’t feel personally relevant.  However, since all of us stand to benefit […]

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Finding an Au Pair: Too Much Detail in Our Host Family Letter?

by cv harquail January 3, 2017
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When it comes to writing the materials you use to find and match with an Au Pair, I’m all for being comprehensive. I’d much rather lay it all out for a candidate (and for myself) so that s/he can make an informed choice about whether or not to pursue an interview with us. I’d prefer […]

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