When a new baby arrives, so do lots of new family dynamics. We’ve discussed so of these already, in the conversation about Having another baby? How to tell your au pair. But, we recently got this request from an au pair, who’d like some help in thinking about the challenges of a new baby in a family that an au pair might face:
Dear AuPair Moms– I searched for this topic and found something from about this concern from the parent’s point of view, and I’ve some comments on situation as an au pair.
I am pretty sure my Au Pair Host Mom is pregnant.
She hasn’t said anything at all. But I’m thinking she might be pregnant, because:
— A letter came from a prenatal clinic. This might seem like snooping but the name was right on the envelope in plain sight. I’m the one who collects the mail.
— My Host Mom is not drinking.
— She sort of looks pregnant (which could go either way, to be honest). I realized it can be downright offensive to ask her, just for that reason alone
I am not sure if I even should ask my Host Mom about her being pregnant, but I am concerned.
I have a several concerns about what a new baby means for my work and my pay.
First, I am honestly not qualified to care for infants.
My childcare experience is minimal, which the family knew when they hired me. I’ve been my host family for a little over two months now. In general I like the family, and I love being around the kids. … Of course there are also things I am really not happy about (like my hours being more than I was told about, etc).
I’m also worried about how my Host Mom’s maternity leave would effect my responsibilities.
My Host Mom would have extensive time off thanks to government benefits. I have found that it’s much harder to do my job well with a parent around.
And, I am concerned that her being home would effect my pay (and my hours).
The au pair before me was only making 300 euro a month when the Host Mom was not working. Once the Host Mom started working her pay was bumped up.
Should I bring any of this up with my Host Mom? Or, should I just wait (and worry) until she says something?
Parents and Au Pairs, keep in mind that this Au Pair is outside the USA. Thus, she is not covered by the regulations around a stable, fixed amount of pocket money regardless of her schedule (up to 40 hours). And, she may not be subject to the requirement that the baby be 3 months old before being left in the care of an Au Pair.
With these specifics in mind, what do you advise?
image: Adorable Infant album-1997-089 from Paul-W