Holiday Cards: Do you include your Au Pair in the family photo? (Poll)

by cv harquail on November 14, 2011


Don’t you love getting holiday cards from friends, especially when the cards have a photo of their whole family? We have so many friends who live so far away that the only chance I get to see how their kids are growing is from the holiday card photos.  Plus, I love to put them on my fridge so that I think of my friends often.

It’s funny how different families have different concerns about the photos. Some families have posed, formal photos by a real photographer, others include a snapshot from an iPhone, and with a few you’ve just got to wonder who thought that picture should be seen in public…

If you are a family that sends out Holiday Cards AND you include a photo with those cards:

Do you include your Au Pair in your Holiday Card photo?

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We’d love to hear how you approach this one…


Taking a Computer Lunch November 14, 2011 at 10:07 am

I generally shoot an informal picture of my kids to send out.

However, toward the end of my AP’s year (usually in the summer) we have a formal family photograph taken with our AP, as well as one of the kids. She gets a copy of each. We send a copy off to family. We also send a copy of the kids’ photograph to all of the former APs, so they can see just how much “their” kids have grown.

Should be working November 14, 2011 at 12:57 pm

We include just the kids, so that solves the problem of whether to include the AP or not in the photo. However, for the family calendar (distributed to grandparents and so forth) we include the AP in some of the photos. DH and I are barely to be seen in that thing.

NorCaMom November 14, 2011 at 7:05 pm

We usually have those cards with multiple photos, and we always include at least one photo of us, the kids and our au pair.

MommyMia November 14, 2011 at 9:16 pm

We alternate between the kids and the whole family, both sans au pairs, and do send holiday photo cards to some of our former APs that we’re in touch with. We also take lots and lots of other photos, and so do our APs, usually, so they have lots of photos to remember their year by. Most have been happy to upload theirs onto our computer (we then can edit and save the best) and we often print a bunch or make a scrapbook album as a parting gift.

lunette67 November 15, 2011 at 9:22 am

There is no choice listed for what we do. I put a photo of the kids on the front of the card, but the inside left has 9 small photos. The au pair is posed with the kids for one of them, and I include some candid shots of her with and without the kids as well.

HRHM November 15, 2011 at 11:03 am

We only do a photo of the kids on our card, but we do invite the AP to come get her picture taken with Santa (and the kids) each winter. Most gladly agree, I worry about the the ones who don’t. :(

DarthaStewart November 15, 2011 at 12:53 pm

If I have a picture with the au-pair, we send it, but sometimes we don’t, so I don’t sweat it. The calendar which goes out does have pictures of the au-pair in it with the kids.

PA AP Mom November 15, 2011 at 6:47 pm

We have a tradition. My mom takes a photo of our family, including the AP, on Thanksgiving morning before lunch. We use that for our Xmas card.

The APs love seeing their face and name on the Xmas card with our family.

OhPleaseNotCaliforniaOrFlorida November 16, 2011 at 12:54 pm

I strongly agree with your last statement. I have never been included in the christmas card, but I would love to be.
I do, however, understand the reasons why families don’t include their au pairs.

Au Pair November 17, 2011 at 12:23 am

It’s funny how none of the families that do not put the au pair in any kind of pictures, didn’t want to give a world here, but they certainly could vote for NO.

Melissa November 17, 2011 at 10:09 am

We don’t include our AP in our holiday card picture. We have plenty of pictures that we take through the year with out AP and certainly include our AP in all of our family traditions and holidays, if she chooses to participate. However, because AP is not a permanent part of our family, and is often is leaving within a few months depending on the timing of her year, I don’t feel a need to include her in the photo. Many of those we send cards to are distant family (people we haven’t spoken to in years, and the xmas card is our only means of keeping in touch) and work associates, and both of those categories would have no idea who our AP is, let alone that we even have an AP, so it just doesn’t make sense for us.

Au Pair November 17, 2011 at 11:42 am

I agree with you Melissa… My family takes pictures only of the children, but if they wanted me to be part of the xmas card, I would have to say no, politely.. Not that I don’t want to be part of the family, but I don’t see a good reason for being in it. The cards go to all the family, friends, that maybe do not know the au pair etc… I make part of mostly family events and I do that because I really want to be around them during those moments and at the same way my family sometimes doesn’t include me in some family activities I’d like to be understood when declining the invitation to be on the xmas card.
PS. I love my family.

Anne Au Pair November 17, 2011 at 4:21 pm

I also agree about not being in the photo that goes out for relatives and/or friends who do not know the AP. I would, however, ask if the family would be okay with me sending cards w/ a picture of myself and the kids (and the HP?) to my family since it’s not really customary where I come from and would certainly be exciting for everyone to get a “traditional”, all-american holiday cad ;)

Amelie ex-aupair November 17, 2011 at 4:32 pm

Agree. As much as I liked my host family and I felt like part of the family when I lived with them… It’d feel very weird having my picture sent to a bunch of people who don’t know me… Afterall, I was gone not long after Christmas… and not everyone understand the ‘au pair’ concept… Imagine the confusion when people get your Christmas cards each year with a different person in it…

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