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Being generous

Extablishing Expectations when an Au Pair Has Guests

by cv harquail November 30, 2011

There’s something about hosting a friend of relative of your au pair that can mess with the fine balance between “part of the family”&  “childcare provider” and between “host mom” and “house elf/slave”. For lots of us, we forget to check our assumptions about how we should act towards other people’s guests, how much of [...]

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Too Good to be True?

by cv harquail October 7, 2011

A while ago I got a request for advice — a host mom was mystified that her desired au pair candidates seemed uninterested in the opportunity she had to offer. After all, what au pair wouldn’t want a situation that required only 20 hours per week, paid vacations with the family, her own apartment underneath [...]

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Do you send a gift basket to your new Au Pair at Orientation? (Poll)

by cv harquail February 22, 2011

Here’s a poll to follow up on my vdiatribe…..

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Enough with the Gift Baskets!

by cv harquail February 21, 2011

A long time ago, I was experimenting with doing a vlog (a video post), but I never posted it because I looked kindof dorky. Also, a few months later, the lovely Susan Robinson of Cultural Care started her AuPairAnswerMom vlogs, and does them so well that I thought I’d just stick to text. But then [...]

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Managing Au Pair Transportation in the ‘Burbs: Ideas for this Host Mom?

by cv harquail August 27, 2010

Our previous two posts, Providing Your Au Pair With Safe, Affordable, Convenient Transportation , and Don’t Abuse A Cluster Taxi have been set-ups for this next question, from SanJoseMom. SanJoseMom is a first-time host parent and trying to organize her expectations and establish a foundation for a successful au pair year. Hi AuPairMom – I [...]

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10 Days of Work that Might Surprise Your Au Pair

by cv harquail June 7, 2010

What’s most surprising thing for Au Pairs to learn about Memorial Day, July 4th and Labor Day? A. They mark the beginning, middle and end of “summer”. B. They are celebrated with barbecues and maybe some nice cold beer. C. They are days when most Americans have “off” but most Au Pairs do not. Answer? [...]

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The 2nd Best Goodbye Gift You Can Give Your Au Pair

by cv harquail May 15, 2010

Last year one of our most active and committed community members “Taking a Computer Lunch“, casually mentioned something that she does for all of her au pairs shortly before they depart. She gives them the gift of “The Box“. What is “The Box”? We give our APs the biggest box their home countries permit, either [...]

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What can an Au Pair expect from a Host Family?

by cv harquail May 3, 2010

In the mirror post to this one, we’re generating a list of ways that families interpret and execute the rules, but with the effect of having the au pair feel mistreated. Here on this page is our chance to list what an au pair can expect from a family when both the family and the [...]

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Locking the Refrigerator, and other ways to mistreat an Au Pair

by cv harquail May 3, 2010

Riffing on the post Do Au Pairs need a bill of rights? about Au Pairs and a domestic workers bill of rights, Dawn mentioned that A clear listing as to what kind of treatment is reasonable to expect would be very helpful in such circumstances. As one example, in a program where the AP expects [...]

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When Your Au Pair Breaks Your Psychological Contract

by cv harquail April 24, 2010

[ Note: I think this might be the longest AuPairMom post I've ever written. It was a long train ride and I think I got carried away.] Host families and au pairs call it mutual expectations, and management scholars call it the “psychological contract”. The idea behind a psychological contract is that we agree to [...]

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