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Random Advice

Do you let your Au Pair drive in the snow?

by cv harquail January 23, 2012

Snowstorms in weird places (like Oregon) and snowstorms in predictable places (like Chicago) have raised the question for many aupair host parents – Do you allow your au pair to drive in the snow? Of course, there are a million variables that affect this decision. Here are the ones I came up with off the [...]

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Would you ask your Au Pair to help out at someone else’s party?

by cv harquail January 22, 2012

Do you think it’s appropriate to ask an au pair to got to your kids’ school and help out at a birthday event there, for someone else’s kids? Here’s the email that prompts the question: Dear AuPairMom – I am mostly satisfied with the family I am working for. We’ve had a few problems but [...]

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Holiday Break: Open Thread

by cv harquail December 29, 2011

How is your holiday going so far? I don’t know why I’m surprised, yet again, that the ‘vacation’ time is passing too quickly, that I have less time than I’d imagined to ‘get things done’, and that I’ve been more or less effective at not feeling too guilty about what’s not getting done. Okay, so [...]

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How can employers help working moms? (Survey)

by cv harquail November 13, 2011

Would you like to share your opinions, insights, and concerns about how employers can support their female employees while these employees pursue their commitment to being great mothers? My colleague Elise Jones is conducting a study looking at factors that influence whether mothers and prospective mothers take advantage of employer-provided work/life support programs, and what [...]

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Query from Reporter: Any takers?

by cv harquail September 11, 2011

We got a request from Annys Shin, writer at the Washington Post, who is looking for host parents in the DC, Maryland or Virginia area whom she could contant for insight about the au pair program. Here’s her contact info if you’d like to ‘help a reporter out’: Annys Shin Staff Writer, Washington Post ShinA@washpost.com [...]

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Tip: Know When to Blame the System (part 1)

by cv harquail August 17, 2011

Tonight I couldn’t sleep (feeling anxious about not posting on APM!) and so I tried to sneak downstairs so I could read the September issue of Vogue until I felt sleepy. Alas, no matter how softly I pressed my toes to the stairs, they groaned. They squeaked. They made so much noise that I could [...]

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What if you Au Pair thinks your child might need professional help?

by cv harquail June 17, 2011

Our au pairs get an up-close and personal view of our families. Sometimes they see things we don’t see, maybe even things we don’t want to see for ourselves. Because au pairs interact with our children when we parents are often not around, and they spend longs days with our kids, they may notice things [...]

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When your Au Pair meets the Kids’ Needs but not the Parent’s Expectations: Ideas wanted

by cv harquail June 14, 2011

Kids and parents want different things. Kids want to stay up, parents want to go to sleep. Kids want to make a mess, parents want that mess cleaned up (eventually). Kids get engaged in fun and learning, while parents must take care of safety, nutrition, and other not-quite-as-fun stuff. We have different sets of priorities. [...]

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What is your family’s Au Pair Selection Process?: Interviews (polls)

by cv harquail May 15, 2011

Busy Mom has been very busy, thinking about how to make the Au Pair Selection Process better. She wrote a long guest post, complete with several suggested polls. Because her effort was so comprehensive, it was a bit much for one post and one conversation theme. So, I’ve broken it down (and added some things [...]

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Getting Past Stereotypes– of Brasilian Au Pairs, for example

by cv harquail April 29, 2011

When in doubt, use a decision rule. It can be clumsy, or crude, or sometimes nearly irrelevant, but a decision rule usually helps when we have so many choices. With choosing au pairs, we often employ decision rules that are good proxies for the information we really want but can’t quite get. For example, we use years [...]

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