Training/teaching

Help A Brand-New Au Pair Get Better At Her Job

by cv harquail June 24, 2017
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It’s not easy to settle in, whether you’re the new Au Pair or the First Time Host Mom. The American college student who sent this email hasn’t had the benefit of a formal Au Pair orientation, and I suspect that her host mom hasn’t had the benefit of a local counselor or group of moms […]

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Don’t Evaluate Your Au Pair’s Performance

by cv harquail October 5, 2016
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Occasionally I get emails from Host Parents wondering about “performance reviews” for au pairs.   These emails ask whether anyone has a form they might share that helps parents evaluate Au Pairs on their performance of specific tasks.  Or, they ask if we have a feedback tracking system, where parents can set goals for au pairs’ performance […]

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How Soon To Schedule Au Pair’s First Day Off?

by cv harquail April 24, 2016
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Venturing into the grey areas of Au Pair regulations and scheduling, a First Time Host Mom asks– how many days might a brand new au pair work before she must be given a day off?   (I phrased it differently in the headline of this post, but essentially it’s the same question).  She’s thinking about […]

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Any Way to Change Behavior of an Au Pair Who’s Always Late?

by cv harquail April 15, 2016
Running Late Au Pair

What do you do when you’ve organized yourself and been clear about your needs, but find yourself unable to influence the behavior of your Au Pair? When communication or training differences pop up, we usually go back to the basics: Do you have a handbook? Do you have regular check-in meetings? Were you clear about […]

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Share Your Schedules for Training Your AuPair — The First Week

by cv harquail April 3, 2016
DailySchedule

Looking over the many posts about getting started with an au pair, I made an interesting discovery: We have no posts with actual, recommended schedules. We have one really solid post from 2008 (!) where I list 5 strategies for orienting your au  pair in the first week: 1. Start with the typical day’s tasks. […]

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What’s the Best Way to Instruct Your Au Pair?

by cv harquail August 28, 2015
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“Blah blah blah blah blah.” There must be hundreds of Au Pairs out there who can appreciate this FarSide cartoon by Gary Larsen.** A Host Parent’s constant instruction can quickly become just background noise. Possibly interesting, possibly important, but rarely punctuated by anything that grabs your attention. And we Host Parents have SO much to say, […]

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Teach Your Au Pair with Examples of Things Done Wrong– by Other People.

by cv harquail August 14, 2015
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When teaching an Au Pair, it’s better to show than to tell.   Whenever you can, point out when something is being done well or done right by your Au Pair, by your spouse, or by someone else. “I love that this nanny is putting the kids into the car from the curb, and not out […]

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Time for a Reset Conversation – with the Whole Family

by cv harquail July 7, 2015
au pair problems, reset conversation

Things were going to hell in a hand basket. Dishes clean but still in the dishwasher. Laundry folded and never put away. Children announcing that they needed to be driven here and picked up there, at the last minute. Spouse “having dinner with a client. I told you about it yesterday” but nothing written on […]

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How to Fix It When Your Au Pair Starts Out On The Wrong Foot

by cv harquail June 29, 2015
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Four weeks in, and your Au Pair still isn’t doing what you’d expected. Worse, s/he’s not doing what you need.   You’ve finished up her formal orientation and in-home training, but your Au Pair hasn’t stepped up to fill the role. Is there anything you can do? There are two kinds of early performance problems. The first […]

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Help Your Au Pair Learn When to “Pick Her Battles” with Kids

by cv harquail December 6, 2014
on the slide

How do you teach the art of knowing when to let things slide? So much of good parenting and good caregiving is about being consistent. Kids thrive on routine. They need consistent explanations, consistent expectations, and consistent consequences so that they learn how to make good choices with their own behavior. Yet, so much of […]

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