Systems

Digital Tools for Scheduling Au Pairs: Share your faves

by cv harquail September 12, 2017

It’s rather pitiful, but I’m still (and perhaps always) a fan of the paper calendar. While I *do* use the Tiny Calendar app on my iPhone, I always was printing out — and adding up by hand — on duty hours. Surely, someone else has a better way? Because Calendaring Host Mom has asked for […]

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Don’t Evaluate Your Au Pair’s Performance

by cv harquail October 5, 2016

Occasionally I get emails from Host Parents wondering about “performance reviews” for au pairs. These emails ask whether anyone has a form they might share that helps parents evaluate Au Pairs on their performance of specific tasks. Or, they ask if we have a feedback tracking system, where parents can set goals for au pairs’ performance […]

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Making New Year’s Resolutions WITH Your Au Pair

by cv harquail January 4, 2016

Number 5 on the short list of stupid, true things about life that I try not to let annoy me is this: It’s hard to change things* when people around you resist having you change. *”things” being: yourself, your situation, how you do things, what gets done, what is prioritized, etc. We forget that our lives are so […]

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When Your Au Pair Eats “Too Much”

by cv harquail October 2, 2015

When you sign up for an Au Pair, you imagine your grocery bills to get about 20% larger. What’s incremental — beyond what you’re already buying — is another adult size portion of the main foods — another 8 oz of meat for each entree, 7 more bowls of cereal, another 3/4 of a gallon […]

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The Weirdest Stuff Can Work Sometimes with Au Pair Host Kids

by cv harquail September 3, 2015

House Elves Encore Presentations Arm Wrestling to decide who gets to decide. Sometimes the sillier you make it, the easier it is for kids to just roll with the concept. In our family, the House Elves are the ones who don’t actually clean up after everyone. They are supposed to, but they don’t. The kids […]

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When What Host Parents Want Isn’t Quite What Host Parents Do

by cv harquail September 1, 2015

Sometimes I look at my Au Pair handbook and roll my eyes. It is more fantasy than reality. More aspirational than actual. I look at the way I’ve described our family life: “We’re a fun loving family who enjoys playing together“, and I think of all the times I’d have preferred to stay on the […]

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Two Kids, One Baby and a New Au Pair: Overload!

by cv harquail August 11, 2015

Where do I start? writes 2K1BabyHM I’ve scoured your site for advice (and found tons!). I’ve made notes of tips and things to discuss with my new AP, but I still have some questions and I wonder if AuPairMom readers can help me out… AP3 has just started – nearly a week ago – but I […]

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3 Ways to Help Your Au Pair Break A Texting Addition

by cv harquail July 28, 2015

… at least while s/he is On Duty caring for your kids. SmartPhone addiction isn’t a metaphor– people actually get hooked on the physical rush of receiving a text. Like Pavlov’s dogs, a simple ‘ping’ starts them salivating for a connection with another person. Another person on the other side of the smart phone, though. […]

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New Year, New Expectations: Having A ‘Reset’ Conversation

by cv harquail January 28, 2015

[ Here’s one from the archives — We’ve been using the term “reset conversation” a lot this past year… here’s where it comes from, and how to execute one. ] There are several times each year, and several times in each AuPair year, when it makes sense to reset your expectations with your au pair. The […]

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When Your Au Pair Repeatedly Loses Things

by cv harquail January 23, 2015

I’m known for losing things. Sunglasses, cell phone, car keys, arguments, emergency chocolate, the Costco card… . I try hard to hold on to things, but the absent-minded part of being a professor is really strong with this one. My own sensitivity to losing things has led me to compensate for potential losses in two […]

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