Handbooks & Manuals

When Having An Au Pair Exposes Cracks in Your Marriage

by cv harquail January 30, 2016
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Getting an Au Pair can expose cracks in your marriage that you haven’t seen before. Getting an Au Pair can also force you to pay attention to dynamics that have been there all along but that you and your spouse have “successfully” avoided before. It’s not the Au Pair herself or himself that “causes” the […]

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When What Host Parents Want Isn’t Quite What Host Parents Do

by cv harquail September 1, 2015
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Sometimes I look at my Au Pair handbook and roll my eyes. It is more fantasy than reality. More aspirational than actual. I look at the way I’ve described our family life: “We’re a fun loving family who enjoys playing together“, and I think of all the times I’d have preferred to stay on the […]

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Teach Your Au Pair with Examples of Things Done Wrong– by Other People.

by cv harquail August 14, 2015
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When teaching an Au Pair, it’s better to show than to tell.   Whenever you can, point out when something is being done well or done right by your Au Pair, by your spouse, or by someone else. “I love that this nanny is putting the kids into the car from the curb, and not out […]

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Welcome Your Au Pair With a Fully-Stocked Bathroom

by cv harquail May 24, 2015
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When your au pair arrives in your home, the way that you’ve prepared for their arrival can say a lot about how excited you are to get to know them. We’re all away of the basic things we should have ready —  a clean, happy bedroom, a freshly printed handbook, a personalized map,  a training schedule, […]

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Au Pair Handbook: Describing “Give and Take” Philosophy

by cv harquail May 23, 2015
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One in an ongoing series of posts on very specific information to include in your AuPair Handbook… HostMom MeanwhileInCanada writes: I am currently in the process of revising the section of my handbook on give-and-take & related attitude (it’s in the section on “being part of the family”). I know there have been multiple discussions on […]

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Au Pair Handbooks: Instructions about Child’s Allergies

by cv harquail May 16, 2015
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As part of a series of posts on very specific information to include in your AuPair Handbook… One HostMom writes: I need to update our handbook to for our incoming au pair with details on our child’s allergy. I’m not sure what level of detail would be helpful, or how to make the issue serious […]

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Your Au Pair Handbook: Can it help you screen for the right candidate?

by cv harquail November 1, 2014
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Your Host Family Handbook can be a good tool for screening prospective Au Pair Candidates. Handbooks generally outline the concrete expectations of a host family as well as the particular rules and parameters that an au pair is expected to work with.  Sure, a long handbook might seem daunting to an au pair candidate, but […]

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Should She Ask Her Host Mom To Read AuPairMom?

by cv harquail September 8, 2014
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Dear AuPairMom – I have been reading AuPairMom while I was deciding to become an au pair and I was expecting that what you have on this blog explains what an au pair should expect. My host mom seems to be having some struggles with having an au pair. I’m my family’s first au pair. My family is […]

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Family Handbook Ideas for Au Pairs Caring For Infants

by cv harquail June 25, 2014
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Caring for an infant, especially when the parents are brand-new to parenting, can pose special challenges for an Au Pair. Au Pairs in these situations will already be ‘infant-qualified’  — meaning that they’ve had direct experience with infants and will know how to do all the basics.  But because parents are still feeling their way […]

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When Your Au Pair’s Parents Come to Visit

by cv harquail January 23, 2014
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Dear AuPair Mom–  We have a lovely, responsible Au Pair whose parents miss her dearly. They have decided to visit twice (twice!) during the year and want to stay with us in order to maximize their time with their daughter.  I’m apprehensive about the whole thing, because hosting parents is not the same as hosting […]

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