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Emotions

Part of the Family: What does that mean to you?

by cv harquail July 1, 2009

What does it really mean for your au pair to be "part of the family"? What do you do in your relationship with her that is different, if you treat her as "part of the family" versus if you don’t? Have you had the opportunity to compare the experience of a live-in caregiver who was [...]

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Au Pair Appreciation: Hooray for all of you!

by cv harquail May 8, 2009

Well, we’ve come to the end of the very first annual International Au Pair Appreciation Week! Thank you to  the host moms and dads who sent in the stories for the Au Pair Appreciation posts this week. Thank you to all of you who commented on the stories, offered snippets of your own stories, and [...]

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Terms of Endearment and Moms’ Deepest Fears. Also, Childcare Myths.

by cv harquail March 12, 2009

Over in the Skribit feature, as a suggested topic, an anonymous person asked “How to deal with the fact that the child calls the Au Pair ‘mom’.” When I first saw this topic suggestion, I planned to ignore it. I wasn’t sure it was from a real host mom. Honestly, how many times have you [...]

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9 Host Mom Questions for 2009: Reflect before you resolve

by cv harquail December 31, 2008

How did we get here already? I was just testing the polling feature to see how many au pairs were on duty on Christmas, and — bam– it’s already December 31st. Maybe the holidays have been like this for you too? Just more family, more fun, (more work!), and overall less blogging time than I’d [...]

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Gift, Bonus or Tip: Call it what you want, but keep in mind….

by cv harquail December 17, 2008

I’m intrigued by the comments in the previous post about a Christmas/ Holiday tip for your au pair… it seems that some readers are taken aback by the idea that one would tip ones au pair. As a trained social scientist, I see these reactions as "data" — but what is the data telling me? [...]

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Food and your Au Pair: Label it if you don’t want her to eat it

by cv harquail December 9, 2008

Do you know what it feels like to spend two precious hours baking several dozen homemade cookies for your daughter’s class party, only to discover the next day, when you go to wrap them, that your au pair and her friends have eaten all but 6? That’s about how I felt last week, when an [...]

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Can This Relationship Be Saved? Should It Be? Your Host Mom advice wanted….

by cv harquail November 18, 2008

Hi Moms- Just got this request for advice from another mom– It’s one of those questions that I find especially vexing: Can this relationship be saved? And, even before that, Should it be?   What do you think?  Here’s the story: I’m having a personality conflict with my au pair and am really unsure as to [...]

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Homesickness and your Au Pair: How you might help

by cv harquail October 15, 2008

Being an Au Pair’s host mom occasionally calls for you to help your au pair take care of herself, both physically and emotionally. You will find yourself needing to offer her ideas about how to distinguish between a cold and an allergy, how to find new friends, and almost certainly how to deal with homesickness. [...]

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