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Cultural Exchange Challenges

F.A.Q.: Must we use an Au Pair Agency to engage an Au Pair?

by cv harquail January 14, 2012

Must we use an Au Pair Agency to engage an Au Pair? Yes. Sure, you can go it alone, but then you would not be operating within US Law. We emphatically recommend that you use an approved agency to find and retain your au pair. Following the laws and regulations protects both your family and [...]

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How has being an au pair Host Parent changed you?

by cv harquail December 15, 2011

Last week I met a woman who’s editing two books on parenting. She was intrigued by the AuPairMom community and the kinds of conversations we have here, and she peppered me with questions. One of the questions she asked was a tough one– I could answer it for myself, certainly, but I was unable to [...]

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Holiday Gift Ideas: What could an Au Pair give to an ‘Host’ Uncle? Housekeeper?

by cv harquail December 4, 2011

I’m so impressed that there are still 19, 22, or 29 shopping days left (depending on the holiday you celebrate), but many of you are already getting organized! Right about when I posted the call for general gift ideas, we received this email from Au Pair MMC. Her gift-giving situation adds four challenges– She needs [...]

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Extablishing Expectations when an Au Pair Has Guests

by cv harquail November 30, 2011

There’s something about hosting a friend of relative of your au pair that can mess with the fine balance between “part of the family”&  “childcare provider” and between “host mom” and “house elf/slave”. For lots of us, we forget to check our assumptions about how we should act towards other people’s guests, how much of [...]

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Christmas & Holidays with your Au Pair: Post round-up

by cv harquail November 25, 2011

The Christmas & Holiday season is now officially upon us — just in time to work off that second slice of pumpkin pie. I think I’m finally figuring out how to do these seasonal celebrations — I’ve got the weekly countdown calendar planner out again. We’ve sent out party invitations and even bought cases of [...]

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Who counts as an “American” family?

by cv harquail September 19, 2011

I imagine that every au pair has an idea of what her or his “ideal” host family should be like. The assortment of children, the family’s location, their personality, their basic household rules… all of this factors in. But how much do you think it matters that the family be “American”-American, rather than German-American or [...]

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Hurricanes? Emergencies?

by cv harquail August 26, 2011

Our Swedish au pair got off Skype with a friend back home in Stockholm last evening as we made dinner, looking rather gray and scared. She asked us to tell her which laws that had been changed now because of Hurricane Irene, and were we allowed to be walking around after dark.

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Struggling to Communicate With Host Dad

by cv harquail August 5, 2011

Every host parent has his or her own approach to interacting with their au pair. Our personalities affect some of this, but even more important is who has taken which role in the host parents – au pair relationship. When adults team up to become parents, homemakers and breadwinners, they divvy up these roles so [...]

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Travel Outside the USA … Paperwork-related cautionary tale

by cv harquail May 10, 2011

Sometimes no matter how many different sources we check, we don’t get enough information to make international travel with our au pairs go without a hitch. JamaicaMom sent this story, and wonders if there was some stone she left unturned, some box she failed to check, some egg that failed to hatch, some colloqualisim that [...]

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Can you help your Au Pair use her free time more wisely?

by cv harquail May 4, 2011

Have you ever been slightly envious of your au pair’s year of adventure? There have been many times that I’ve wondered what I mgiht have been like had I been an au pair (or an exchange student) and had the chance to live somewhere so different, make different friends, try new things, and experiment with [...]

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