A while back I asked if any of you had forms, checklists, or other organizing tools that you’d like to share with AuPairMom readers… and several of you (who are better organized that I) sent some in. Just a few days ago, I got a request from Talliecat:

My friend has a very… shall we say “lame duck”? au pair. She could use some kind of daily checklist. She is desperate.. any help is appreciated.

Lucky for your friend and her sanity, we have two different kinds of daily sheets to share. They both download as MSWord documents.

SavvyHostDad sent this Au Pair Daily Log Page, which is a full page per day.

The Daily log is just to help us communicate with AP each day…and for AP to communicate with us.

We came up with this after realizing what kinds of information we had to keep asking for, over and over. Often, on busy days we didn’t have time to really give instructions, or to get updates from AP at the end of the day when she had a class. Plus we would get home at the end of the day and be out of milk, bread, etc. So having this form helped to prompt both us and our Au Pair to include important information.

We print it out on one sheet of paper, so that parents fill out the front half [leave lunch instructions, medicine to give, etc., while the AP leaves notes on the back.

And, ShouldBeWorking sent us this Au Pair Log Page for APM.doc.  This one is more compact, with three days on a page.

I hope they’ll be helpful!

image: Lila on a Messy Desk from lavocado@sbcglobal.net
I just switched browsers to Chrome, and I haven’t loaded it up with enough ways to clip screenshots… or I’d have done that for you here. Getting back on the learning curve.

(First published on 9.11.09.  Republished with original comments.)

Thinking about ‘lessons’ from 9-11 can often be heartbreaking, especially in my community where so many of us lost family, friends and co-workers in the WTC attacks. It’s almost disrespectful to bring up the idea of a “9-11″ plan, but maybe thinking ahead about how we might respond to a similar event is useful and consoling.

Here’s my story about 9-11 plans …

For the first time ever one of my friends was willing to leave her kids with me for an entire day so that she could go into NYC for a ‘Girls Day Out”. That morning, she came over not only with the kids but also with a manila file folder. In the manila file folder was her 9-11 plan.

Her 9-11 plan included emergency phone numbers for her and her partner, their parents, siblings, and close friends’ phone numbers and addresses, the location of the ‘stash of cash’ and emergency supplies in their house, and the address of an extended family member’s home in rural Pennsylvania. This was their emergency ‘meet up’ place where, if separated during a terrorist attack, they would regather after fleeing the NYC area.

My friend’s partner worked in downtown NYC, was there on 9-11, and was unable to reach her by phone or email that day. My friend waited 8 hours to find out that her partner was safe. She knows she was lucky. We know moms who were not as lucky. She didn’t and doesn’t ever want to experience that again, and we pray she never will.

Just in case there is ever a national disaster or tragedy on a serious scale, when she or her partner are away from their kids and unable to protect them, she has their plan all spelled out on two sheets of paper she can give to whoever is in charge while she’s gone.

Until my friend shared her 9-11 plan with me, I thought I was the only mom who had one of these, written down for our au pair, just in case. In an odd way I appreciated discovering that someone else was similarly concerned, and that she had a plan in advance. Just in case.

In the days right after 9-11, I had several phone conversations with the frightened mom of our then-Au Pair, reassuring her that we would take care of her daughter in the event of another attack. Our 9-11 plan includes plans for caring for our au pair. Before we matched with our next au pair, we talked with her about our 9-11 plan, so that she could reassure her parents.

As the years have passed, we have talked about this less, but we still have a plan.

Do you?

Photo by Andy Ciordia on Flickr

As every reader of this blog knows, we are big fans of the concept of the Family Handbook. And by “we” I don’t mean the royal  moi, but all of us host parents (and even au pairs). It really helps to create a handbook to get your expectations and needs out into clear language, and it helps your au pair to have explanations s/he can refer to.

Our handbooks can get pretty long.  The more we know about challenges, and the more we learn about our preferences, the more pages we seem to add to these books. Our family handbooks can appear daunting to a new au pair too — All those rules! Procedures! Explanations! Curfews! English words I don’t recognize!

On paper, we thoughtful, well-prepared host parents can come off looking like nags, dictators, and uptight prisses who will be impossible to live with (even though we are not that way). The challenge is always — do we spell it all out and risk looking insane? Or do we leave things out (and hope they won’t be missed) in order to look less rigid or rule-bound?

We also recommend that you send these handbooks to our prospective au pairs so that they can know (as clearly as we can spell it out) what to expect as our au pair. Some host parents (I’m thinking of you, CalifMom) send the handbook to all prospective au pairs as part of the “I dare you to match with our family” strategy. The idea here is  “forewarned is better than ambushed”.

Unfortunately, sending an incoming au pair our complete (obsessively detailed) handbooks can misrepresent the otherwise loving, open and relaxed familys/he has yet to meet in person. The handbook can  even scare (or scare off) an otherwise great au pair.

Given the tension between informing your au pair and freaking him or her out,  the question is– when is the best time to send an incoming au pair your handbook?

[There are a lot of choices here -- and I'm sure that sometimes you use a combination. Give it your best shot.]

This squestion comes up for NewbieHostMom, who wonders:

We have our first au pair arriving this weekend. Should I send her our handbook before she gets here? I am a little obsessive, maybe even compulsive. Our handbook is extensive. If I send her to her today or tomorrow she will be getting it a few days before she departs for her orientation. Is that too much, or will it be appreciated? She seems to want the info, and I did send her a basic schedule for hours, but I am just not sure what to do.

I suggested that she send just the schedule and driving rules — as a taste of things, but a small enough amount that it wouldn’t overwhelm (Also, at this point the au pair might only be able to read it as an email, not printed out, and that could complicate things too.)

What do you all think?

West Coast Mom suggests that we pool our collective wisdom to generate a packing list for our incoming au pairs.  This list would not include the basics (they’ll all think to pack underwear). Instead, this list would cover wht an au pair needs to bring to support her or his adventure.

What we pack reflects our expectations

What we pack for a trip reflects what we’re expecting will happen, what we’re expecting we’ll do, and what we’re expecting we’ll need– but it’s not just about the “things” we pack, it’s about the meaning of these “things”.

I suspect that if we were to randomly open the luggage of 5 incoming au pairs, we’d get a tour of many of their hopes and dreams for the year ahead.

Since we host parents have seen more than a few adventure years, and seen what kinds of things surprise au pairs, we might have ideas for “what to pack” that could help them out. So, off the top of my head, here are:

5 Things an Au Pair Should Bring

1. A modest bathing suit:  One that covers your whole behind, please. One that you can wear at the town pool.
   
2. Your favorite children’s book, in your own language, to share with your host kids
3. Medications like Birth Control Pills: Many medicines are more expensive here than they are in your home country. If you are on a prescription medication, and/or if you have favorite remedies for ailments common to you, bring them along.
4. Space in your luggage: You can buy a lot of things here (and you probably will).
5. A List of your Goals for the year: Thinking explicitly about what you want to get out of your year, and having this written down, is a way to remind you what it’s all about when you feel homesick, when you feel lost, and when you’re offered opportunities you might not have considered.

On the other hand,

It’s also important to think about what not to bring.

The stuff I have seen come out of au pair luggage has boggled my mind sometimes, when I think of how heavy it was and how much room it took up. You don’t need to bring your own Rollerblades here– we can find you a pair. Really.

5 Things an Au Pair Should Not Bring

1. Towels, sheets and pillows: We have these in the US! And, we have them here in our houses for you to use. Use the extra space in your luggage for something more fun.
2. Hot Wax Melter & Waxing Supplies: There are lots of options for depilatation that aren’t electric, that aren’t heavy and that are effective.
3. A musical instrument larger than a clarinet: It may not be in perfect condition, but we can find you a second hand guitar to use while you’re here. And, there are inexpensive accordions on eBay all the time.
4. More than 3 stuffed animals: Your Host Kids will be happy to share some of theirs with you, I promise.
5. Precious and rare Hello Kitty items: Sanrio has outlets here, and the Hello Kitty stuff you can buy here will be rare back home.
   

   

• Parents, what things would you recommend an au  pair bring, to support his or her adventure?

• What’s best left behind?

• And, (we all want to know) what crazy items have been brought to the States by your au pairs?

See Also:

The “Before You Leave Home” E-mail
Getting her stuff back home: Is there a cheap way to ship things?
Tip: Save those Ice Skates! (about providing seasonal & one-off items for your au pair)

Long before there was OMG, ROTFLMAO and WTF, there was RTFM.

R ead
T he
F (your favorite F word here. We use “family”)
M anual

We put a lot of work into those family manuals and handbooks, and we expect them to be useful to our Au Pairs. However, before the Au Pairs find these handbooks useful, they actually have to read them.

What can we do to get our Au Pairs to read the handbooks?
Here’s what I’ve tried:

1. Give her the handbook on the first night so that she can start to read it before the first work day. [Or, send the handbook ahead (either before she leaves or at orientation)]

2. Tell her which sections of the handbook we’ll be going over in her next at-home orientation session, so that she can read ahead.

3. Assign her specific on-duty time to read the handbook.

4. Take sections out of the handbook, handing her a pencil, and asking her to tick off each item as I demonstrate it to her or talk to her about it.

5. Have her read the point, guideline, or paragraph aloud, with me, and then discussing whether she understands it.

6. Asking her to identify for me any works she does not understand, concepts she does not understand, or guidelines she does not agree with, so that we can discuss them.

7. Writing funny personal notes in random spots on the manual, to suggest that I was expecting her not only to read the manual but to bring up a topic with me in conversation.

One of the straws that broke me with our ‘flame out’ au pair was my discovery that she had never actually looked through the family handbook in its entirety…despite my having gone through all of these steps at least twice with her. When she finally admitted that much, I really did want to scream ‘Read the F–ing, #@$^%-@%($&!^)% Family Handbook!” at the top of my lungs, but I refrained.

Instead I called our LCC and told her we were ready for a rematch.

What have you tried that seems to work?

Write it in the comments, and we’ll read it. We promise.

The comment from PA AuPair mom in the post about docking the au pair’s pay sent a chill down my spine, and reminded me that I need to write and post this bit of advice:

Before your Au Pair leaves, be sure to settle all accounts with her.

This advice is not for host parents who want to screw over their au pairs in some vindictive way for all the various damage the au pair may have caused— Of COURSE it isn’t, because those kinds of host parents don’t read this blog. This advice is for host parents who want to act honorably and also make sure that their au pair keeps her commitments. Moving on…

With my agency, and I bet with others, there is a form that you fill out when your au pair is departing, either for rematch or for home. This form acts kind of like a balance sheet, where you can calculate if you own her any money (e.g., the remaining reimbursement for the up to $500 she has spent on classes) or whether she owes you money (e.g., phone bill, deductible, etc.).

In my experience, I have never owed an au pair money, but instead have been owed money.

Have a ‘nearing the end’ meeting

It’s a great idea to have what I call a ‘nearing the end’ meeting, where you clarify things like financial obligations, how she is getting to the airport, that she needs to ship her own 38 pairs of shoes home, and what bills might still be outstanding. Remember that you can often check phone bills online as the charges accrue, and you can use averages from previous bills to estimate the final bill. This is also a good time to tell your au pair about the “checkout list”, so that she can plan ahead to do this cleaning.

Have a conversation about outstanding bills in plenty of time, so that neither you nor she is left ‘holding the bag’ — her with not enough money to pay you, you with not enough remaining to pay her to withhold what should be withheld.

Before you lose your leverage

You need to make sure that you ask your au pair to pay any outstanding or anticipated bills before the very last week of her time with you. By then, your au pair may not only have already spent or committed this money to something, but also you have lost any kind of leverage you have over her to get her to pay.

Not that you necessarily want to dock her pay, but do you want to be the one left holding the $168 long distance phone bill?

You know, the bill you racked up when you were making unauthorized phone calls to Brazil, but that I didn’t discover until after you left, you little blank? Yeah, I know you got the emails that I sent you at your rematch family’s home. I know that our LCC called your new LCC to nudge you to send the money. I know that I paid you for vacation time you supposedly accrued when you refused to watch my children because you simply had to visit NYC. And I know that you still owe me $168.

Ooops sorry, I digress.

If you are in a situation like the one PA mom mentions, where her AP owes her $500, but where the host parents only have 2 weeks of pocket money left as leverage ($360 or so), it’s gonna be tough to get all of the money back that you are owed. Not only is this unfair, but also it can easily generate a lot of resentment that, if unattended, can dent your relationship with your next au pair.

Be sure to anticipate remaining expenditures, and set up a time to settle accounts, in plenty of time.

A treat from Calif Mom! Knowing that I’d be away from the blog (for a little longer than I’d planned) Calif Mom sent us a present: a guest post on calendars! Here’s her advice, with the usual blend of wisdom and wit! cv

Dorsi mentioned Google Calendar in a comment advising a host mom who is managing both a recalcitrant AP and a complicated schedule. Which got me thinking about the whole calendar bugaboo.

The simple calendar has more often than not been my nemesis, instead of helpful tool.

They would sit optimistically in the kitchen, stuck on the fridge and scribbled on in a riot of colored pens, blissfully unaware that they were missing half of the “no school” dates. Or, trying diligently to follow The Organizers’ Rule about only having one calendar, I would put personal items in my work calendar on blackberry, and forget to hide certain items. I don’t necessarily want my boss or colleagues knowing I need to leave early for a urologist appointment or which morning the preschool play is being held. Through the years many playdates have slipped away simply because I couldn’t confidently pick a date/time and so didn’t take action, or the kids got double booked. I’ve even been surprised to learn of a morning that HD was traveling that day for three nights that he thought he told me about. These things have a big impact on parents, kids, and APs.

These days, I am all about simplifying the things I personally need to try to remember/worry about, and clearly, calendaring is a huge challenge for us. And try as I might, no one else would take it over as their job. When I read about google calendar in the comments here on aupairmom, I pounced.

So, at the risk of sounding like an ad, here’s why I am a new convert (and proselytizer, apparently) of Google calendar. Its whole premise is that many people can sign into a single calendar any time of the day through their web browser, and post both schedule items and tasks. “Change orthodontist appt”, “big car’s oil light came on,” etc. It even lets you add appointments from your blackberry so you can pop them in whenever you think of it, then go back and add details later. Very handy.

HD may not like it as much as I do, because now he “has to” enter his stuff onto our calendar all by himself, rather than emailing it to me, happily dumping them off his list and squarely onto mine.

Google calendar is an emotionally neutral way to stop the “Mom’s in charge of the calendar” madness!

Gone are the crumpled sticky notes in the crevices of my handbag. Plus HD can feel like an early adopter of a spiffy new electronic app. Perfect!

I want our AP making playdates (I confess, I hate that job!) but I figured out she wouldn’t do it if she didn’t feel confident that the schedule is really free. Nor is she willing to bug me at work (and often can’t reach me), bless her, so that’s another hurdle put behind us as we run this relay race of modern family life. Now AP can see what days and times are available. She adds the playdates she sets up, the day the library books are due, and the days she *really* needs me to get home on time because she’s going to volleyball or conversation class.

One caveat–if you truly enjoy, need, or want to be the sole person in total control of your family’s calendar, you probably won’t love this as much as I do. Though it would still work for you, because you could set permissions so that only you can add or change items. Plus, if you like to be in charge of the calendar “all by myself” you undoubtedly already have systems figured out that work for you. You probably always know exactly what you’re doing a week ahead of time so you can share it with AP, and you remember to do so. This app really helps cover for me in those regards.

I love that my au pair, DH and I can all add things to the calendar when we think of it or when it’s convenient. (And access is unlikely to get blocked by the hyper-vigilant IT folks because, well, it’s google and I can’t imagine they will ever block that.) Unlike my old paper calendar on the fridge, this one is never only partially up-to-date because there is other stuff in my head or stale emails in my inbox waiting to be written down. (Hmm. Come to think of it, my fridge still says it’s June.)

We have been using “The Goog” for several weeks now, and it seems to work well for us.

Problems arise only when we forget to use it — GIGO, as the programmers used to say.

[note: When I grow up I want to be CalifMom's au pair!  cv]

My sister Julia and her family spend the bulk of their summer at the New Jersey shore, biking between the pool at my dad’s house, the pool at the beach club, the river and the ocean. Only one of these locations has professional lifeguards– the rest of the time we all depend on sensible swimmers and alert adults to keep everyone safe.

To man the lifeguard role, the adults– including my sister’s au pairs and my family’s au pairs — take turns. It becomes pretty important to be explicit about who’s on lifeguard duty, since we wander back and forth from the refrigerator, bathroom, dock and beach. Usually my sister tries to stick me with the lifeguard duty so that she can lose herself in Linkin Park and a Dick Francis murder mystery. However, despite having once been a lifeguard, no one will pay me enough to do it, so we all end up taking turns.

Since we often have guests and other family members, we’ve had to devise some systems and rules for using the pool and for swimming in general.

They may sound officious, but in this case it’s much better to spell things out explicitly than to assume it’s all understood.

Pool Rules for Granny and Granddad’s

1. There must be an adult outside if any child is outside by the pool. No one should ever swim alone, not even an adult. There should always be another person there in case of emergency.
2. Some adult must always be ”officially” on duty as a lifeguard. Usually, this will be the au pair when she’s on duty; however, other adults will also be on duty when necessary.
3. When you are on lifeguard duty and you need to go inside, etc. you must either ask the children to get out of the pool OR ask another adult to take charge. When another adult takes charge, say out loud to the kids “Granny’s on lifeguard duty!” and make sure Granny agrees, Then, when you come back out, shout “I’m on lifeguard duty”. This way EVERYONE knows who is in charge and whether it is their turn. It seems dumb but it prevents people from assuming that Granddad is on duty when really he’s already asleep in the lounge chair.
4. When you are on lifeguard duty, you must sit near the pool, ready to jump in. You may listen to music but only with one- not both- earphones in. (You must be able to hear the kids.) You may flip thru a magazine but not read a book—magazines are easy to put down, and books can get too absorbing.
5. If any child disobeys your directions when you are on lifeguard duty, that child loses oopsicle privileges for the entire day.
6. All of our kids know how to swim BUT you can’t expect them to be safe from drowning because they can swim. Children must be watched closely while swimming.
7. The pool is too shallow for diving but the kids can jump in. No dunking or pushing people in the pool.
8. No running on the concrete around the pool.
9. Do not use flotation devices as a substitute for supervision.
10. When anyone goes in or out of the gate, make sure that they close it tightly. Never prop open the gate — dogs and kids will wander away.
11. Make sure we show you where the rescue equipment is located (on top of pool house). Also, make sure we show you how to use th e life-preservers and ropes that are stationed on the dock.
12. If a child wants to play in the sand at the shore of the river, you must position yourself so that you can see both the child by the river and the kids in the pool. (Not as hard as it sounds). It is okay to wade in the river but not to go deeper than the child’s waist.
13. Please make sure all of the children have sun screen before they go outside to the pool for the first time. The kids use 30 or higher sun screen. The kids think that they can do they own, but they always need help, especially with their backs. Please reapply sun screen after long swims or after a few hours.
14. Children need to wear life preservers on the dock as well as in the boat or on the jet ski. No child can go out on the dock without your permission. Adults must wear life preservers on the jet ski.
15. Ask the kids to use the bathroom before they get in the pool.
16. All toys must be put away before we leave. The kids should do clean up after themselves, with just a little help. Please check to make sure nothing is left in the pool.
17. Towels should be brought outside and hung on the back of chairs to dry or placed in the washer. Please ask Granny her preference for that particular day. (It always depends on how much other laundry there is.) Towels should not be left inside on the floor (the kids often do this and it drives Granny crazy!)
18. Granny does not allow eating anywhere but outside and the kitchen,
19. Children should not go inside dripping wet – they must dry off a bit before going inside.
20. If a child is missing, check the pool first. Seconds count in preventing death or disability. Go to the edge of the pool and look over the entire pool, bottom and surface, as well as the pool area. We have a telephone by the pool, use it to call 911 in an emergency.

Do you have any important pool rules? Please share!

Photos by Justalexanders, on Flickr. http://www.flickr.com/photos/justalexanders/3576567892/

When I started au pair momming 11 years ago, there was no such thing as an Au Pair Handbook. My au pair agency never recommended that I create a family manual, and my LCC actually laughed when I told her that I’d put together a printed list of guidelines for our incoming au pair.

My, how times have changed.

Now, on the website of (at least) one au pair agency, you can find suggested guidelines, rules and procedures. There are some books out there on hosting au pairs, one of which comes with a downloadable master family manual! And, there are hundreds of us host moms and dads who have recognized what we need from our au pairs, translated this into guidelines, and written them down in our own Au Pair handbooks.

I have sent copies of my family’s au pair handbook to over 3 dozen host parents over the years. At one point, when I was talking with a friend of a friend of a friend about her getting an au pair, she told me she’d been given a example Au Pair handbook and she’d send it to me. Can you imagine my surprise at discovering that it was an edited copy of my own handbook !

Over the course of my au pair mom career, our family guidelines and handbook have expanded to cover more and more situations. They have been revised to reflect the changes in our children’s routines and ages, and they have incorporated much of what I’ve learned "the hard way" by breakdowns, accidents, and ineffective au pair – host family communication.

Our family handbook is now kind of rangey. The writer in me looks at it and winces, since there are many repetitions, awkward categories, and so on. Our handbook is even in two pieces– a set of Guidelines (which are more or less the ‘rules’) and a Handbook (which is more about principles and strategies) , with lots of overlap in between. But even so, both in the actual words and what is between the lines, you can get a sense of my family’s priorities and values.

We have a great opportunity to learn from each other and to share our hard-earned wisdom, simply by sharing our au pair handbooks. Although no handbook can tell you the ‘secret’ to a great au pair relationship, a good handbook helps you set a foundation of expectations of the au pair and of your family that you can help you establish and build a good relationship.

So here’s your invitation — send us a page of your Au Pair Handbook.

- Send a page that covers either one particular topic (cars, food, childcare strategies), or

- Send a page that reflects some unique wisdom from your experience.

- Be sure to remove any information that is too personal (e.g., kids’ names, AP names, code for your burglar alarm).

- If you want to copyright your page, please do.

Email these as either MS word attachments or pasted into an email.  Send them to mom at aupairmom dot com.  I will gather these together in some kind of organized way on a Resources page that everyone can access.

Let’s see what we can learn when we take a page from each other’s books!

Images from Etsy: Watermelon Wishes

When your aupair is getting ready to leave for home or for ‘her next adventure’, there is a confusing array of tasks for her to attend to. Here is a partial list of tasks — tasks related to the home and the kids– that might help you and your departing aupair stay focused.

Bedroom
Remove sheets from the bed.

Leave the comforter and decorative pillows on the bed, no need to wash these.

Spread the bad with the comforter and pillows, but without sheets.

Wash all the sheets, fold them very neatly, and put them in the closet.

Remove any decorations from the walls, remove any adhesive tape left behind.

Vacuum the entire room carefully, including under the bed, under and behind other furniture, and the corners of the ceilings. Lookout for spiderwebs.

Empty out the drawers completely, vacuum them inside if they’re still dusty.

Empty out the closet, and return all hangers neatly to the closet rod.

Wash the mirror and glass table tops with the blue spray glass cleaner to get them completely clean.

Please do not leave anything behind in your room for the next aupair unless you check with me first.

Bathroom
Wash, dry, and fold all the towels and all the bath rugs.

Put the towels and drugs in a neat stack in the closet in the bedroom closet.

Clear all of your toiletries and beauty products from the cabinet and the cupboard.

Wash the mirror with glass cleaner.

Wipe down the inside of the medicine cabinet, especially the plastic shelves.

Scrub the toilet and the bathtub with cleanser.

Use the vacuum cleaner to vacuum the entire floor, especially under the bathtub and in the corners. Pay special attention to getting up from the floor any bits of dust and hair.
Electronics
Remove any of your files and discs from the laptop computer.

Be sure to check the area around the computer for any of your small electronic items and their adapter cords — you don’t want to leave anything behind by mistake.

Turn the laptop computer and monitor completely off.

Make sure you take any of your DVDs from the area around the television.

Turn off the television completely.

Put away any DVDs that you might have borrowed from the family.

Telephone
Change the outgoing voicemail message on your house phone and also on the cell phone, giving someone a telephone number or e-mail address where you can be contacted.

Erase any voicemail messages and contacts information from the telephone.

Remove your name from the cell phone welcome screen.

If you have changed any of the voicemail passwords, return those passwords to the original numbers.

Other items: mail, telephone messages on the house phone, library books, library card, videos, random stuff
Please leave us a street address where your mail can be forwarded if any pieces if anything is delivered here after you leave.

Go to the post office and fill out a card they are so that the post office can automatically forward your mail to your new street address.

Please leave us a telephone number that we can share with anyone who calls trying to reach you.

Be sure to let your bank know that your address is changed, you don’t want to miss any important documents.

If you have any outstanding library books, please return these to the library.

If you have any videos rented from Blockbuster, return these videos

If you have a family blockbuster card, gather this up.

Please bring down the aupair notebook, and any other parenting books or information we might have given you.

If you have any car keys, pool tags, bike lock keys, etc. please gather these up.

Car
Take the car to a car wash and have it cleaned fully inside and out.

Check all of the compartments in the car for your belongings.

Fill the tank completely with gas.

Check to make sure that the insurance documents and maps are put away neatly in the car glove box.

Finishing up your au pair responsibilities

You should leave all of the kids” things that you are responsible for in neat and tidy order. The idea here is to leave everything ready for the next aupair when she arrives later this week.

Laundry
Finish washing the kids’ laundry, fold it and put away.

Check the laundry room for any random pieces of kids’ laundry, put it away.

Check the laundry room for any of the kids’ ironing, finish that up, put it away.

Be sure to check the laundry room for your clothing — it’s easy to leave something behind on the drying rack or in one of the laundry baskets.

Kids’ bedroom
Put fresh sheets on the kids’ beds.

Wash the old sheets, fold them neatly, and put them away in the linen closet.

Tidy up the girls’ room.

Other areas
In all of the places around the house that the aupair is responsible for keeping tidy, gather all library books, laundry, shoes, etc., and cookies away wherever they go. Please leave these areas very neat.

For the Host Parent(s)

Cleaning supplies:
Make sure that you give your aupair all the supplies she might need to get her room clean.

Offer her a few boxes, tote bags, etc. in which she can pack extra stuff.

Have any duct tape? She might need that too.

Paperwork
Be ready to complete the paperwork that closes out your aupair’s year. (Our agency gives us a form for this.) The worksheet helps calculate how much money you might owe your aupair for education expenses and vacation day(s). It also reminds you to check to see if there are any outstanding telephone charges that the aupair may be responsible for.

[I sketched out this list the last time we had an au pair depart...while it's specific to my house and the things that drive me nuts (e.g., au pair leaving without telling me the voicemail password...), you can of course modify it to fit your needs. As always, your mileage may vary.]

Can you think of anything else that should be added to this list?

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