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Can this relationship be saved?

Our Au Pair is Dating My Husband’s Close Friend. Now what?

by cv harquail February 4, 2012

And speaking of trying to maintain some privacy around ones adult social life, Here’s an email that has me completely stumped.  How do they stay “host parents” to their au pair, and friends with their friend, and have any separate adult social life? We really need your ideas here, folks. Dear Au Pair Mom, I [...]

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When Host Parents Divorce, should Au Pairs testify?

by cv harquail February 2, 2012

Divorces test all relationships within a family. As the primary/initial family relationship dissolves or is destroyed, all other relationships get implicated. Even the relationships with Au Pairs. Previously, when we’ve discussed how divorces affect au pairs, we’ve mentioned things like crazy schedules, divided loyalties, concerns about finances and stability, and even whether one parent can [...]

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Do you let your Au Pair drive in the snow?

by cv harquail January 23, 2012

Snowstorms in weird places (like Oregon) and snowstorms in predictable places (like Chicago) have raised the question for many aupair host parents – Do you allow your au pair to drive in the snow? Of course, there are a million variables that affect this decision. Here are the ones I came up with off the [...]

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Would you ask your Au Pair to help out at someone else’s party?

by cv harquail January 22, 2012

Do you think it’s appropriate to ask an au pair to got to your kids’ school and help out at a birthday event there, for someone else’s kids? Here’s the email that prompts the question: Dear AuPairMom – I am mostly satisfied with the family I am working for. We’ve had a few problems but [...]

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When an ‘Au Pair’ should really be a Nanny

by cv harquail January 19, 2012

Sometimes you just don’t want to read the subject lines of the emails that show up in our AuPairMom emailbox. The email posted below came with the subject line, “Am I being taken advantage of?”. But, by the time the au pair finished telling her story, it was clear it the subjuct should have been [...]

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Don’t Let BedBugs Take a Bite out of Your Au Pair Relationship

by cv harquail January 13, 2012

As a host parent, you’ve worried about car accidents, flu shots and even head lice. But did you ever think you’d need to worry about bedbugs? HMJ didn’t think so. But now, bedbug-related fears — all very reasonable — are challenging her relationship to her terrific Au Pair. Dear AuPairMom – We are 18 months [...]

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Our Au Pair Hates Our Dog: Ideas to help?

by cv harquail January 8, 2012

What do we do when our au pairs don’t like our pets? No au pair is required or should be expected to take care of a dog by walking him, feeding him or training him. Pets are most assuredly not the responsibility of an au pair. While a pet-friendly au pair may be happy to [...]

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Holiday Break: Open Thread

by cv harquail December 29, 2011

How is your holiday going so far? I don’t know why I’m surprised, yet again, that the ‘vacation’ time is passing too quickly, that I have less time than I’d imagined to ‘get things done’, and that I’ve been more or less effective at not feeling too guilty about what’s not getting done. Okay, so [...]

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Lonely Au Pair Plans Early Departure – Do we approve?

by cv harquail December 3, 2011

Hi there AuPairMom, I was hoping you may be able to give me some advice. I am a 22 year old UK girl working as a AuPair in Germany. I have been here for just over 3 months. When I first arrived I found it difficult but was soon used to the job. The family [...]

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How can employers help working moms? (Survey)

by cv harquail November 13, 2011

Would you like to share your opinions, insights, and concerns about how employers can support their female employees while these employees pursue their commitment to being great mothers? My colleague Elise Jones is conducting a study looking at factors that influence whether mothers and prospective mothers take advantage of employer-provided work/life support programs, and what [...]

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