Like or Dislike: 0

When it is figured out that you are working in a bar (not just additional, off-the-books hours for your HPs), not only can you and the HF be kicked out of the program (for placing the agency at risk of violating the State Department rules), but the bar as a corporation and the owners as individuals can be fined by the IRS and could also be subject to criminal and civil proceedings for hiring an illegal worker, which you are by working in a bar on a J-1 Visa without written Agency aproval.

But, hey, since you are earning more money even though you were fully aware of the exact terms of your AP employment at the time you agreed to become this (or any) family’s AP, then “the ends justify the means”, right? Make sure you attend their trial, or at least kick in for their fines. It would be polite, at the very least.

Next time, don’t agree to be an AP in the US and instead take a job with proper documentation more in keeping with the style which you prefer to become accustomed. The rules were in B&W before you ever set foot on US soil. Don’t cry crocodile tears over circumstances you walked into with your full consent. Find another board for that.

(sorry, guys, but I’ve about had it on this topic).

Like or Dislike: 0

Like or Dislike: 0

I work as an au pair 4 days a week ( that’s the time my hf needs me)
I work fridays and saturdays nights in a bar
and I work on weekends taking care of my host mom’s baby and dog

and I am happy becuase I am saving to pay for college when I am back home. And as I said before I dont care if it illegal because I really need the money and the paymet as au pair sucks and everyone know it!!…plus in my case…THE ENDS JUSTIFIES THE MEANS!!!

Like or Dislike: 0

Like or Dislike: 0

I say AT MINIMUM above because the US government regs calculation does not take into account the other (often substantial) “compensation” and au pair may receive.

To wit, inter alia:
- use of a car, sometimes sole use of a car
-car insurance
- educational contribution
-cell phone service
-internet service
-gym or club memberships
-trips or plane tickets

Like or Dislike: 0

Au pairs, I don’t mind if you post constructive advice and comments here, but please take the time to read the site and educate yourself on the point of view of host families before you go spouting off hate and judgement.

Like or Dislike: 0

The tone and insults in this post are inappropriate and as TACL points out, misunderstand the structure of the AP program in the US.

That said, I do know a few HFs who treat their APs like on-call servants. It is horrifying to me, and I have told the APs (friends of my AP) that they should speak up, schedule themselves for other events, and so on. But then again, we have had plenty of posts on this website from American APs in Europe who say that their HFs treat them like servants and expect inappropriate work and hours from them (e.g. scrubbing floors, doing HPs’ laundry).

Like or Dislike: 0

The minute an AP takes a second job and suddenly becomes unavailable to work a typically scheduled shift or her attitude toward AP work becomes negative because the other job pays “better” (because she’s not factoring all the other things the HF brings to the table), the HF suffers. I don’t think that is disgusting or self-centered. It is a privilege to be able to afford to host an AP, and one that for some of us means forgoing other luxuries. Not wanting an AP to work a second job doesn’t mean we don’t appreciate them. In fact, one could argue that we like the childcare that they provide so well, that we don’t want the young woman in our home to become exhausted by stretching herself too thin.

The AP year should be one of exploration – learning a new language, taking the requisite classes and touring – the luxury for the AP should be that of having free time — and time to figure out who she is and what she wants to do for the rest of her life (because as a HM, I’m well-aware that taking care of children is not a long-term goal). She won’t be able to do that if she is working all the time — and neither will you!

Like or Dislike: 0

I can understand the it is illegal argument because the host families spend a lot of money to have the AP come to the US. The $5-7000 they spend is very different than becoming an au pair elsewhere. It seems in the US the State Department has allowed it to become a very profitable business because the costs of obtaining an au pair do not even come close to the expense that is charged to obtain one. I can understand why families would not want to lose their investment in their AP. I however, can not understand all of the other arguments. The AP is not there to become your domestic slave to answer to your every demand. The AP’s free time is exactly that. They are not obligated to work extra hours unless it was agreed by both parties in advance. Many of you seem to be very hypocritical when claiming she will be too tired. have none of you ever worked more than one job before???? I have worked as many as 3 jobs in the US and have never let my responsibilities suffer. Some people are motivated. Some people are hard workers. You should respect her ambition to work hard in her life. Clearly, some people are able to handle the extra work load and some are not, but thinking her life should entirely revolve around you is selfish and hypocritical. Just because you have invested so much money in your AP does not entitle you to oppress her in domestic slavery as you squeeze every last dollar you can out of her. Your AP is not a commodity to be bought and sold to the highest bidder…it sure does seem many of you think of them as an object that is in your home for you to exploit to the greatest extent. I am not surprised any of your APs left before her contract was up because she was there not to be your slave, but to be a part of your family and to enjoy her time in the US.

I am so thankful I am not an AP in the US where you over work them and for very little pay. Do the math, if they are making $200 a week and they work 45 hours a week, that is $4 and hour!!!! I can be certain that every AP is worth far more than $4 and hour to raise your children because you are too busy to raise them yourself. Try finding someone in the US to raise your children for $4 an hour! You won’t. You can’t. Why? Because it is illegal in the US to not pay a citizen less than minimum wage, which I believe in most states is around $8 an hour. You should have more appreciation for the role your AP has in your life and your home. Cut them some slack and let them enjoy their lives and make friends. I make $600 per month here in Turkey…I am more of a sister than an employee. My family treats me like a member of the family. If I want to go out with friends or do something they are flexible and allow me to have a life. I am here to assist them not cater to their every whim. We are both in this arrangement for the benefits it provides. I get to be a apart of a loving family and enjoy an amazing new country. They get to have someone to help them with looking after their two girls and playing games with them. The biggest perk, is I don’t have to do any housework like the APs in the US, the housekeeper does that. I don’t punch a clock with set hours, we work together as a family to meet both of our schedules. I am so lucky to have a family that wants me to be happy and enjoy my life here. They respect me and appreciate me….too bad the APs in the US don’t get to know what that feels like…some of you sound like slave drivers and I would not live with you if you paid double! I wouldn’t want to be treated like I am commodity. Just to be clear, I am not saying I condone the APs in the US from getting a second job because it is illegal…but I also don’t condone the other reasons you have besides that for not wanting your AP to have one…..disgusting self-centered Americans.

Like or Dislike: 0