January 2012

Thriving despite conflicts: 9 Rules of Negotiating with Your Au Pair

by cv harquail January 29, 2012
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One of the crazy benefits of being an au pair mom or dad is that host parenting gives us many chances to practice skills that make us better everywhere in our lives. Chief among the skills we get to practice is how to negotiate. By using conflicts with our au pairs (or even simple disagreements […]

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Should au pair rules be changed, to allow for “extra vacation without pay”?

by cv harquail January 25, 2012
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Within the legal boundaries of the au pair program, both host parents and au pairs like to have a bit of personal discretion. We want to be able to satisfy family demands and any sensible au pair dreams. We want to be flexible when issues come up, and we want to be accommodating and reasonably […]

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Do you let your Au Pair drive in the snow?

by cv harquail January 23, 2012
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Snowstorms in weird places (like Oregon) and snowstorms in predictable places (like Chicago) have raised the question for many aupair host parents — Do you allow your au pair to drive in the snow? Of course, there are a million variables that affect this decision. Here are the ones I came up with off the […]

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Would you ask your Au Pair to help out at someone else’s party?

by cv harquail January 22, 2012
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Do you think it’s appropriate to ask an au pair to got to your kids’ school and help out at a birthday event there, for someone else’s kids? Here’s the email that prompts the question: Dear AuPairMom – I am mostly satisfied with the family I am working for. We’ve had a few problems but […]

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When an ‘Au Pair’ should really be a Nanny

by cv harquail January 19, 2012
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Sometimes you just don’t want to read the subject lines of the emails that show up in our AuPairMom emailbox. The email posted below came with the subject line, “Am I being taken advantage of?”. But, by the time the au pair finished telling her story, it was clear it the subjuct should have been […]

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F.A.Q.: Must we use an Au Pair Agency to engage an Au Pair?

by cv harquail January 14, 2012
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Must we use an Au Pair Agency to engage an Au Pair? Yes. Sure, you can go it alone, but then you would not be operating within US Law. We emphatically recommend that you use an approved agency to find and retain your au pair. Following the laws and regulations protects both your family and […]

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Don’t Let BedBugs Take a Bite out of Your Au Pair Relationship

by cv harquail January 13, 2012
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As a host parent, you’ve worried about car accidents, flu shots and even head lice. But did you ever think you’d need to worry about bedbugs? HMJ didn’t think so. But now, bedbug-related fears — all very reasonable — are challenging her relationship to her terrific Au Pair. Dear AuPairMom – We are 18 months […]

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Our Au Pair Hates Our Dog: Ideas to help?

by cv harquail January 8, 2012
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What do we do when our au pairs don’t like our pets? No au pair is required or should be expected to take care of a dog by walking him, feeding him or training him. Pets are most assuredly not the responsibility of an au pair. While a pet-friendly au pair may be happy to […]

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New Year Review: Reset Au Pair Expectations for 2012

by cv harquail January 7, 2012
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There are several times each year, and several times in each AuPair year, when it makes sense to reset your expectations with your au pair. The start and end of school, the start and end of summer, when there is a big change in your family’s routine (like the end of maternity leave), or when […]

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4 Household Rules to Protect Your Host Parent Sanity

by cv harquail January 3, 2012
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If you take it out, put it back. If you open it, close it. If you drop it, pick it up. If you take it off, hang it up. These rules also work well in situations with children, spouses, coworkers, or other humans.     Image by Brooke Ryan, available on Etsy. This graffiti was […]

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